essay about love your self

Essay Papers Writing Online

Tips for crafting a compelling and authentic personal essay.

Writing an essay about yourself can be a daunting task, but when done right, it can be a powerful tool to showcase who you are and what makes you unique. Whether you’re applying for college, a scholarship, or a job, a well-crafted essay can help you stand out from the crowd and leave a lasting impression on the reader.

When writing a personal essay, it’s important to strike a balance between being informative and engaging. You want to provide the reader with insight into your background, experiences, and goals, while also keeping them interested and invested in your story. In this guide, we’ll walk you through the process of writing a compelling essay about yourself, from brainstorming ideas to polishing your final draft.

Essential Tips for Crafting

When crafting a compelling essay about yourself, it is important to think about your audience and what message you want to convey. Here are some essential tips to help you create an engaging and authentic essay:

A Powerful Personal Essay

Writing a powerful personal essay is a way to express your unique voice and share your personal experiences with the world. By weaving together your thoughts, emotions, and reflections, you can create a compelling narrative that resonates with your audience. To craft a powerful personal essay, start by reflecting on your own experiences and exploring the themes that matter to you. Pay attention to the details and emotions that make your story come alive. Be honest and vulnerable in your writing, as authenticity is key to connecting with your readers. Additionally, consider the structure of your essay and how you can effectively organize your thoughts to engage your audience from beginning to end. By following these tips and staying true to your voice, you can create a powerful personal essay that leaves a lasting impact on your readers.

Choose a Unique Aspect

When writing an essay about yourself, it’s important to focus on a unique aspect of your personality or experiences that sets you apart from others. This could be a specific skill, talent, or life experience that has had a significant impact on your life. By choosing a unique aspect to highlight, you can make your essay more compelling and memorable to the reader. It’s important to showcase what makes you different and showcase your individuality in a way that will capture the reader’s attention.

of Your Personality

When writing about your personality, it’s important to showcase your unique traits and qualities. Describe what sets you apart from others, whether it’s your creativity, resilience, sense of humor, or compassion. Use specific examples and anecdotes to illustrate these characteristics and provide insight into who you are as a person.

Highlight your strengths and acknowledge your weaknesses – this shows self-awareness and honesty. Discuss how your personality has evolved over time and mention any experiences that have had a significant impact on shaping who you are today. Remember to be authentic and genuine in your portrayal of yourself as this will make your essay more compelling and engaging to the reader.

Reflect Deeply on

When writing an essay about yourself, it is crucial to take the time to reflect deeply on your life experiences, values, beliefs, and goals. Consider the events that have shaped you into the person you are today, both positive and negative. Think about your strengths and weaknesses, your passions and interests, and how they have influenced your decisions and actions. Reflecting on your personal journey will help you uncover meaningful insights that can make your essay more compelling and authentic.

Your Life Experiences

When it comes to writing an essay about yourself, one of the most compelling aspects to focus on is your life experiences. These experiences shape who you are and provide unique insights into your character. Reflect on significant moments, challenges you’ve overcome, or memorable events that have had a lasting impact on your life.

• Consider discussing pivotal moments that have influenced your beliefs and values.
• Share personal anecdotes that highlight your strengths and resilience.
• Explore how your life experiences have shaped your goals, aspirations, and ambitions.

By sharing your life experiences in your essay, you can showcase your individuality and demonstrate what sets you apart from others. Be genuine, reflective, and honest in recounting the events that have shaped your journey and contributed to the person you are today.

Create a Compelling

When crafting an essay about yourself, it is essential to create a compelling narrative that captures the attention of the reader from the very beginning. Start by brainstorming unique and engaging personal experiences or qualities that you want to highlight in your essay. Consider including vivid anecdotes, insightful reflections, and impactful moments that showcase your character and achievements. Remember to be authentic and sincere in your writing, as this will resonate with your audience and make your essay more relatable. By creating a compelling narrative, you can effectively communicate your story and leave a lasting impression on the reader.

Narrative Structure

The narrative structure is crucial when writing an essay about yourself. It helps to create a compelling and engaging story that showcases your unique qualities and experiences. Start by introducing the main theme or message you want to convey in your essay. Then, build a coherent storyline that highlights significant events or moments in your life. Use descriptive language and vivid details to bring your story to life and make it more relatable to the readers. Include a clear beginning, middle, and end to ensure that your essay follows a logical progression and captivates the audience throughout.

Emphasize the lessons you’ve learned from your experiences and how they have shaped your character and outlook on life. Connect these insights to your personal growth and development, demonstrating your resilience, determination, and self-awareness. End your essay on a reflective note, highlighting the impact of your journey on who you are today and what you aspire to achieve in the future. By following a strong narrative structure, you can craft a captivating essay that showcases your authenticity and leaves a lasting impression on the readers.

Highlight Your

When writing an essay about yourself, it is essential to highlight your unique qualities and experiences that set you apart from others. Consider including personal anecdotes, achievements, strengths, and challenges that have shaped your identity. Focus on showcasing your authenticity and individuality to make your essay compelling and engaging.

Related Post

How to master the art of writing expository essays and captivate your audience, step-by-step guide to crafting a powerful literary analysis essay, convenient and reliable source to purchase college essays online, tips and techniques for crafting compelling narrative essays.

Home — Essay Samples — Life — Being Yourself — The Importance of Self-love

The Importance of Self-love

• Categories: Being Yourself Believe in Myself Finding Yourself

About this sample

Words: 555 |

Updated: 11 December, 2023

Words: 555 | Page: 1 | 3 min read

Works Cited

• Baumeister, R. F., & Campbell, J. D. (1999). The Psychology of Self-Esteem: A Revolutionary Approach to Self-Understanding that Launched a New Era in Modern Psychology. Jossey-Bass.
• Branden, N. (1994). The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work on Self-Esteem by the Leading Pioneer in the Field. Bantam Books.
• Chaudhary, H., & Kaur, P. (2015). Role of self-esteem in building healthy relationship among adolescents. Indian Journal of Positive Psychology, 6(2), 216-219.
• Crocker, J., & Park, L. E. (2004). The costly pursuit of self-esteem. Psychological Bulletin, 130(3), 392-414.
• Harter, S. (1999). The Construction of the Self: A Developmental Perspective. Guilford Press.
• Heatherton, T. F., & Polivy, J. (1991). Development and validation of a scale for measuring state self-esteem. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 60(6), 895-910.
• McKay, M., Fanning, P., & Davis, M. (2007). Self-Esteem: A Proven Program of Cognitive Techniques for Assessing, Improving, and Maintaining Your Self-Esteem. New Harbinger Publications.
• Rosenberg, M. (1965). Society and the Adolescent Self-Image. Princeton University Press.
• Ruffin, J. (2016). Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It. CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform.
• Sowislo, J. F., & Orth, U. (2013). Does low self-esteem predict depression and anxiety? A meta-analysis of longitudinal studies. Psychological Bulletin, 139(1), 213-240.

Video Version

Cite this Essay

Let us write you an essay from scratch

• 450+ experts on 30 subjects ready to help
• Custom essay delivered in as few as 3 hours

Get high-quality help

Dr. Heisenberg

Verified writer

• Expert in: Life

+ 120 experts online

By clicking “Check Writers’ Offers”, you agree to our terms of service and privacy policy . We’ll occasionally send you promo and account related email

No need to pay just yet!

Related Essays

3 pages / 1501 words

1 pages / 514 words

2 pages / 1053 words

4 pages / 1697 words

Remember! This is just a sample.

You can get your custom paper by one of our expert writers.

121 writers online

Still can’t find what you need?

Browse our vast selection of original essay samples, each expertly formatted and styled

Related Essays on Being Yourself

Dove. 'Dove Real Beauty Sketches.' YouTube, uploaded by Dove US, 14 April 2013, www.youtube.com/watch?v=litXW91UauE.Neff, Kristin D. and Elizabeth P. Shoda. 'Self-Compassion: An Alternative Conceptualization of a Healthy [...]

Essay about self-image delves into the intricate relationship between how we perceive ourselves and how others perceive us. Our self-image plays a pivotal role in shaping our confidence, choices, and interactions with the world. [...]

“I wish I may, I wish I might, Wish up on this star tonight.” “twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are, like a diamond in the sky, twinkle twinkle little star.” As children we are taught these nursery rhymes, at [...]

I prefer to be true to myself, even at the endangerment of finding the ridicule of others, rather than to be false and finding my own detestation. Why should I worry about what others think of me? I don’t give a shit about how [...]

“Some things may be equally essential but nothing is more important than a healthy sense of self-esteem and loving yourself.” - Henrik Edberg. Having confidence in your own worth or abilities is defined as having a healthy [...]

I consider myself fortunate to have grown up in a household filled with books. My mother, a librarian by profession, instilled in her children a deep appreciation for reading from an early age. While I may not recall the name of [...]

Related Topics

By clicking “Send”, you agree to our Terms of service and Privacy statement . We will occasionally send you account related emails.

Where do you want us to send this sample?

By clicking “Continue”, you agree to our terms of service and privacy policy.

Be careful. This essay is not unique

This essay was donated by a student and is likely to have been used and submitted before

Download this Sample

Free samples may contain mistakes and not unique parts

Sorry, we could not paraphrase this essay. Our professional writers can rewrite it and get you a unique paper.

Please check your inbox.

We can write you a custom essay that will follow your exact instructions and meet the deadlines. Let's fix your grades together!

Get Your Personalized Essay in 3 Hours or Less!

We use cookies to personalyze your web-site experience. By continuing we’ll assume you board with our cookie policy .

• Instructions Followed To The Letter
• Deadlines Met At Every Stage
• Unique And Plagiarism Free

What are your chances of acceptance?

Calculate for all schools, your chance of acceptance.

Your chancing factors

Extracurriculars.

15 Tips for Writing a College Essay About Yourself

What’s covered:.

• What is the Purpose of the College Essay?
• How to Stand Out Without Showing Off
• 15 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself
• Where to Get Free Feedback on Your Essay

Most students who apply to top-tier colleges have exceptional grades, standardized test scores, and extracurricular activities. How do admissions officers decide which applicants to choose among all these stellar students? One way is on the strength of their college essay .

This personal statement, along with other qualitative factors like teacher recommendations, helps the admissions committee see who you really are—the person behind the transcript. So, it’s obviously important to write a great one.

What Is the Purpose of the College Essay? 

Your college essay helps you stand out in a pool of qualified candidates. If effective, it will also show the admissions committee more of your personality and allow them to get a sense of how you’ll fit in with and contribute to the student body and institution. Additionally, it will show the school that you can express yourself persuasively and clearly in writing, which is an important part of most careers, no matter where you end up. 

Typically, students must submit a personal statement (usually the Common App essay ) along with school-specific supplements. Some students are surprised to learn that essays typically count for around 25% of your entire application at the top 250 schools. That’s an enormous chunk, especially considering that, unlike your transcript and extracurriculars, it isn’t an assessment of your entire high school career.  

The purpose of the college essay is to paint a complete picture of yourself, showing admissions committees the person behind the grades and test scores. A strong college essay shows your unique experiences, personality, perspective, interests, and values—ultimately, what makes you unique. After all, people attend college, not their grades or test scores. The college essay also provides students with a considerable amount of agency in their application, empowering them to share their own stories.

How to Stand Out Without Showing Off 

It’s important to strike a balance between exploring your achievements and demonstrating humility. Your aim should be to focus on the meaning behind the experience and how it changed your outlook, not the accomplishment itself. 

Confidence without cockiness is the key here. Don’t simply catalog your achievements, there are other areas on your application to share them. Rather, mention your achievements when they’re critical to the story you’re telling. It’s helpful to think of achievements as compliments, not highlights, of your college essay.  

Take this essay excerpt , for example:

My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go. 

Instead of saying “ I received this scholarship and participated in this prestigious program, ” the author tells a story, demonstrating their growth and initiative through specific actions (riding the train alone, applying academic programs on her own, etc.)—effectively showing rather than telling.

15 Tips for Writing an Essay About Yourself 

1. start early .

Leave yourself plenty of time to write your college essay—it’s stressful enough to compose a compelling essay without putting yourself under a deadline. Starting early on your essay also leaves you time to edit and refine your work, have others read your work (for example, your parents or a teacher), and carefully proofread.

2. Choose a topic that’s meaningful to you 

The foundation of a great essay is selecting a topic that has real meaning for you. If you’re passionate about the subject, the reader will feel it. Alternatively, choosing a topic you think the admissions committee is looking for, but isn’t all that important to you, won’t make for a compelling essay; it will be obvious that you’re not very invested in it.

3. Show your personality 

One of the main points of your college essay is to convey your personality. Admissions officers will see your transcript and read about the awards you’ve won, but the essay will help them get to know you as a person. Make sure your personality is evident in each part—if you are a jokester, incorporate some humor. Your friends should be able to pick your essay from an anonymous pile, read it, and recognize it as yours. In that same vein, someone who doesn’t know you at all should feel like they understand your personality after reading your essay. 

4. Write in your own voice 

In order to bring authenticity to your essay, you’ll need to write in your own voice. Don’t be overly formal (but don’t be too casual, either). Remember: you want the reader to get to know the real you, not a version of you that comes across as overly stiff or stilted. You should feel free to use contractions, incorporate dialogue, and employ vocabulary that comes naturally to you. 

5. Use specific examples 

Real, concrete stories and examples will help your essay come to life. They’ll add color to your narrative and make it more compelling for the reader. The goal, after all, is to engage your audience—the admissions committee. 

For example, instead of stating that you care about animals, you should tell us a story about how you took care of an injured stray cat. 

Consider this side-by-side comparison:

Example 1: I care deeply about animals and even once rescued a stray cat. The cat had an injured leg, and I helped nurse it back to health.

Example 2: I lost many nights of sleep trying to nurse the stray cat back to health. Its leg infection was extremely painful, and it meowed in distress up until the wee hours of the morning. I didn’t mind it though; what mattered was that the cat regained its strength. So, I stayed awake to administer its medicine and soothe it with loving ear rubs.

The second example helps us visualize this situation and is more illustrative of the writer’s personality. Because she stayed awake to care for the cat, we can infer that she is a compassionate person who cares about animals. We don’t get the same depth with the first example. 

6. Don’t be afraid to show off… 

You should always put your best foot forward—the whole point of your essay is to market yourself to colleges. This isn’t the time to be shy about your accomplishments, skills, or qualities. 

7. …While also maintaining humility 

But don’t brag. Demonstrate humility when discussing your achievements. In the example above, for instance, the author discusses her accomplishments while noting that her parents thought of her as immature. This is a great way to show humility while still highlighting that she was able to prove her parents wrong.

8. Be vulnerable 

Vulnerability goes hand in hand with humility and authenticity. Don’t shy away from exploring how your experience affected you and the feelings you experienced. This, too, will help your story come to life. 

Here’s an excerpt from a Common App essay that demonstrates vulnerability and allows us to connect with the writer:  

“You ruined my life!” After months of quiet anger, my brother finally confronted me. To my shame, I had been appallingly ignorant of his pain. 

Despite being twins, Max and I are profoundly different. Having intellectual interests from a young age that, well, interested very few of my peers, I often felt out of step in comparison with my highly-social brother. Everything appeared to come effortlessly for Max and, while we share an extremely tight bond, his frequent time away with friends left me feeling more and more alone as we grew older.

In this essay, the writer isn’t afraid to share his insecurities and feelings with us. He states that he had been “ appallingly ignorant ” of his brother’s pain, that he “ often felt out of step ” compared to his brother, and that he had felt “ more and more alone ” over time. These are all emotions that you may not necessarily share with someone you just met, but it’s exactly this vulnerability that makes the essay more raw and relatable. 

9. Don’t lie or hyperbolize 

This essay is about the authentic you. Lying or hyperbolizing to make yourself sound better will not only make your essay—and entire application—less genuine, but it will also weaken it. More than likely, it will be obvious that you’re exaggerating. Plus, if colleges later find out that you haven’t been truthful in any part of your application, it’s grounds for revoking your acceptance or even expulsion if you’ve already matriculated. 

10. Avoid cliches 

How the COVID-19 pandemic changed your life. A sports victory as a metaphor for your journey. How a pet death altered your entire outlook. Admissions officers have seen more essays on these topics than they can possibly count. Unless you have a truly unique angle, then it’s in your best interest to avoid them. Learn which topics are cliche and how to fix them . 

11. Proofread 

This is a critical step. Even a small error can break your essay, however amazing it is otherwise. Make sure you read it over carefully, and get another set of eyes (or two or three other sets of eyes), just in case.

12. Abstain from using AI

There are a handful of good reasons to avoid using artificial intelligence (AI) to write your college essay. Most importantly, it’s dishonest and likely to be not very good; AI-generated essays are generally formulaic, generic, and boring—everything you’re trying to avoid being.   The purpose of the college essay is to share what makes you unique and highlight your personal experiences and perspectives, something that AI can’t capture.

13. Use parents as advisors, not editors

The voice of an adult is different from that of a high schooler and admissions committees are experts at spotting the writing of parents. Parents can play a valuable role in creating your college essay—advising, proofreading, and providing encouragement during those stressful moments. However, they should not write or edit your college essay with their words.

14. Have a hook

Admissions committees have a lot of essays to read and getting their attention is essential for standing out among a crowded field of applicants. A great hook captures your reader’s imagination and encourages them to keep reading your essay. Start strong, first impressions are everything!

15. Give them something to remember

The ending of your college essay is just as important as the beginning. Give your reader something to remember by composing an engaging and punchy paragraph or line—called a kicker in journalism—that ties everything you’ve written above together.

Where to Get Free Feedback on Your College Essay 

Before you send off your application, make sure you get feedback from a trusted source on your essay. CollegeVine’s free peer essay review will give you the support you need to ensure you’ve effectively presented your personality and accomplishments. Our expert essay review pairs you with an advisor to help you refine your writing, submit your best work, and boost your chances of getting into your dream school. Find the right advisor for you and get started on honing a winning essay.

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

• Legacy Projects

How to Write a Short Essay About Yourself: Step-By-Step

Updated 06/4/2022

Published 06/19/2020

Yvonne Bertovich

Contributing writer

Cake values integrity and transparency. We follow a strict editorial process to provide you with the best content possible. We also may earn commission from purchases made through affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. Learn more in our affiliate disclosure .

Writing or even talking about yourself may not come easily to you. However, for professional or educational reasons, it’s often a necessity. There are other instances when writing about yourself may make more sense, as you can provide the rawest and most honest perspective.

Jump ahead to these sections:

Steps for writing about yourself, tips for writing about yourself creatively or confidently.

• Examples of Things to Write About Yourself

You should feel empowered—not intimidated—in taking on a writing project about yourself. Use it as a way to challenge how you view your own experiences, talents, and more. We’ll discuss some steps for writing about yourself as well as provide a few examples.  

Writing isn’t for everyone, especially when it’s required. As much as you may dislike it, following the steps below can help the process go that much more smoothly.

If you find that following a different order than what we’ve recommended for you works better for your process, feel free to adjust accordingly. 

Step 1: Determine your purpose 

What’s causing you to write this “thing” about yourself? What exactly are you writing? It may surprise you that people write all kinds of pieces for themselves—even writing your own obituary isn’t out of the question anymore. 

The more specific you can get with yourself about your purpose will help the rest of the process. If it’s something stressful, like a college admission essay or a cover letter, try to frame the project in a different light. 

For example, “I’m writing this essay to show people my heart and how passionate I am about removing disparities and barriers in healthcare. I believe in my abilities, and I want to further my education, so I can help heal people.”

Step 2: Ask yourself some questions 

For any good piece of writing, there has to be fact behind it (if even these facts are abstract in narrative or fiction). The best way to gather facts about any subject is to ask a variety of questions, both soft- and hard-hitting. 

You may ask these questions internally, during research, or directly and literally. Treat this question step as a self-interview.

Here are some questions to ask yourself . You may also ask yourself:

• What is my goal of writing this piece?
• What themes or ideas do I want to focus on?
• What are my strengths and weaknesses?
• What are some important lessons I’ve learned?
• What do I want others to know or understand about me?

Step 3: Organize your answers 

After asking yourself the example questions above as well as others, you should be sure to write down your answers and begin organizing them if you haven’t already. 

It may be tempting to just answer your own questions in your head as you go—but don’t. This will just make the writing step more difficult. You may think that you’ll remember every good point or profound thought you come up with, but memory is a tricky thing. 

If you’re working through your questions during a time when you’re not ready or able to sit down and type or scribble them out, at least make some notes in your phone or in a journal so you can have some descriptive hints for later. No matter how big of an epiphany you may have, it’s possible you’ll forget it. 

Step 4: Write a draft 

If your ideas are already fairly organized, writing your draft should come fairly easily to you. The draft process, however, is when you can start spicing things up with anecdotes, your own personal voice, themes, metaphors—all that fun stuff. The point in you writing something about yourself for yourself is for the very reason that you can make it unquestionably you .

Dull, watered-down words or even over-hyped language from a thesaurus plug-in isn’t going to impress anyone. Writing something about yourself (unless the assignment is creative or unorthodox) isn’t the time to act like something you’re not.

All of this being said, don’t stress yourself out too much. Letting your ideas flow freely and then editing or revising them later is how you should approach the process anyway. You don’t want to put too many restrictions on your ideas from the get-go. Warring with yourself about your ideas while writing is only going to tire you out sooner. 

Think about it—you may spend hours trying to write a piece while overthinking that’s no better than a draft you could have written in 30 minutes on the fly. Not being totally in love with your first draft is normal. It just allows you that much more room to improve. 

Step 5: Put your progress aside

Much like during the draft process, it’s very possible to overthink your work after it’s mostly done. If you constantly keep re-reading it or rehashing your ideas in your head, they may start to sound odd, or you may try to add where you need to trim. 

For example, the same concept applies to repeating the same word over and over aloud — it’ll likely start to sound strange or even wrong the more you hear it. This also applies to music — ever play a song you love over and over till you hate it? 

You need to give your words and your brain some time to rest away from each other until you try to make any drastic edits or changes. That being said, you may love what you’ve written already and decide you don’t need to change a thing—that’s great!

Step 6: Review and edit

After your break, you can pick up your writing once again. Read it with a critical eye. Go back and think deeply about your purpose and any provided prompts. Have you answered everything you intended to or are required to?

It’s not uncommon—though devastating—to write an entire piece only to realize you wrote from the wrong frame of reference or focused on the wrong issue. For example, if you were asked to write about a challenge you overcame in your life by following an important virtue, but you only wrote about winning a basketball championship and not the struggle behind it, this may miss the mark. 

If you find a good number of issues in your work, don’t feel tempted to scrap the entire thing. What may work instead is to copy and paste your writing line-by-line into a new document. This way, you can save as much as possible while being sure to resolve even small discrepancies.

Step 7: Finalize your work

After you’ve undergone the brutal process of self-editing (or enlisting help from someone else you trust) you can prepare yourself for the home stretch. Finalizing your work shouldn’t take very long.

Y our process may differ; however, it’ll likely come down to reading over your work a few more times just to make sure you haven’t missed words, punctuation, or proper grammar. 

It’s OK to use this step to feel proud of yourself, too. You may not take a lot of time to reflect on your life and everything you’ve been through—it’s important to practice self-love in this way and celebrate your accomplishments.

Talking or writing about yourself may not be everyone’s cup of tea. For example, did you need to provide a fun fact recently but draw a blank? You’re not alone. In fact, many people have a false assumption that they’re boring. 

On the flip side, perhaps you’re used to talking about yourself, or, at least you’ve got the “fake it till you make it” type of confidence down-pat. However, you too can only benefit from adding a bit more razzle-dazzle to your spiels and writing assignments. Here are a few tips for writing about yourself creatively or confidently.  

Allow yourself space

If you have an upcoming project or writing assignment that has you on edge, consider stepping away. Even if you don’t consider yourself an outdoorsy person, a walk around the block may help you breathe and get your creativity flowing. Naturally, the more sound your idea or angle, the more confident you’ll feel about your upcoming performance.  

Keep that ego in check

An underinflated ego is just as bad as an overinflated one. Pay close attention to your internal dialogue when approaching new projects or writing tasks (or, honestly anything that comes up during your day). How much of what swirls around in your mind is fact? How much of it is just fleeting thoughts or opinions? You are not your thoughts, and you always have choices. Make good ones and be kind to yourself. 

Try this: Instead of thinking to yourself, “Wow, this is a really complex writing assignment. I can’t do this.” Or, “How am I ever going to get into my dream school with this essay? I’m not a strong writer.” 

Change your internal dialogue to, “I have good ideas. I may not have my plan figured out right now, but I’ll get it done,” or, “I have so many great skills to bring to the table and I am very passionate about what’s brought me here. I will convey this the best I can.”

Crowdsource

Sometimes an outside opinion can give us much-needed perspective. Ask your friends, family, loved ones, or coworkers to describe you in a few words or even in abstract ways. Don’t view this as you’re fishing for compliments. Ask your loved ones for honesty, as this insight can only help you when writing about yourself. 

Build up a fuel bank

Pulling inspiration out of thin air may not always be possible. However, if you build up a few reliable sources of inspiration, the next time a project hits, you’ll be prepared. You can fuel your creativity and confidence in a variety of ways. 

For example, you can create certain playlists for different moods, save favorite art or graphics in a digital folder or keep printed versions in your home or office, write down affirmations or notes-to-self in a journal or app, and so on. 

Reflect on past accomplishments and setbacks

Even if you aren’t a fan of journaling, writing about yourself is far easier if you take the time to reflect, if only mentally. If you know you have a deadline to write about yourself in the near future, you may want to physically or mentally jot down a few real-life examples or experiences that come to mind. 

But how do you get in the right headspace to reflect? What if you only witness recurring thoughts about past events while trying to fall asleep? Be sure to practice the first tip in this section: Give yourself some space to think. For once, limit the distractions, keep all other screens put away or turn on your "do not disturb" feature.

Now, think about some past accomplishments or setbacks that may not even seem relevant to the topic of the assignment. You may have an epiphany about unrelated things or discover something about how you operate. For example, you might realize that you feel less nervous in social and professional settings if you call out your anxiety as being excited. 

Examples of Writing About Yourself

Even if you feel super confident about writing about yourself now, we wanted to provide a few short examples to help you get started. Your tone, word choice, and more may differ depending on which piece you’re working on.

Here are some tips for writing or publishing your life story you may also find helpful. 

In a memoir or essay

Those were probably the best and the worst days of my life. I had never felt more happy and never felt more sad. I felt as though I were so close to having everything I had ever wanted, yet it seemed with every step forward, I had to take two steps back. It was exhausting. How did I get through it? To be quite honest, I have no damn idea. 

Perspective helped. I knew I could have had it way worse; I knew that my struggle wasn’t unique. I knew, too, that even when the small wins would come they’d have yet another loss right on their tails. I paid dearly for having too much heart and optimism, so I regularly had to hose myself down with logic and pessimism. 

On your blog or website

If you’re reading this, it’s too late. Just kidding! That’s just a really good Drake album. I wanted to take some time to talk about what’s been going on in my life lately for those of you who are nosey enough to care. Again, kidding, I know some of you really care. I’m so grateful to have even this small following that I have. It’s wild, really. Who would have thought that people want to know what’s going on in my head at any given time? Joke’s on you guys, though, because I don’t fully know all the time. 

I guess I’ll start off by saying that work has been a whirlwind. As you all know, it isn’t an easy time for anyone, so please don’t take this declaration as a complaint. I’m thrilled to still have a job despite everything going on. However, leaving this reflection at just that would be doing both myself and you all a disservice. It’s weak. It doesn’t really describe what’s been going on. Allow me to continue.  

In a college essay

When I was young, my grandmother told me I couldn’t please everyone — that some people just wouldn’t like me for no reason at all. This was very hard for me to swallow at times. What does this have to do with who I am today and why I plan to attend your university? 

Well, this early lesson demonstrates that in order for this world to keep spinning, we all have to be unwavering in our own pursuits. We are ourselves. We can’t be anyone else. In that, we all have the responsibility to bring our unique talents, wisdom, and heart to the table — even when we’re seated across from people who may not like us. 

Sometimes Only You Can Do It

Writing about yourself may always be challenging for you, but who better to do so than who knows you best? If you work through the process in every situation and give yourself some patience, there’s no question that you can’t craft something amazing. You may also be interested in this article about how to write family stories .

Your written words mean more than you think. This becomes a part of your legacy when you're gone, and it's one of the ways you'll be remembered. While many families choose custom urns from Foreverence or even to craft memorial diamonds from Eterneva , your words are something that live after you're gone.

While it might not seem natural at first, learning to write about yourself, your perspective, and your experiences carries a lot of significance. Who knows who might read these words when you're gone?

Categories:

• Condolences & What To Say

You may also like

9 Tips for Dealing With Family Dysfunction After a Death

How to Write a Meaningful Letter to Your Future Self

How to Write a Thank You Letter to Your Mentor: 6 Steps

How to Write a Legacy Letter From the Heart: Step-By-Step

Self-Love: The Most Important Love of your Life

• Embracing You Therapy
• February 16, 2021

We hear it all the time: “Love yourself!” We hear how loving ourselves is the most important, most beneficial thing we can do. But what we sometimes don’t hear, or fail to understand, is how . What is self-love? What does it mean to practice it? How do we begin to do so?

Self-love is having a relationship with yourself that has compassion, kindness, patience, tolerance, and curiosity. It does not mean that you are so nice to yourself that you never take accountability or responsibility for mistakes you made – “Oh, well, I really love myself and think I’m great, so that couldn’t possibly be my fault!” Self-love is about giving yourself grace and forgiveness when you inevitably make mistakes. It doesn’t mean that you are arrogant, or even worse – a narcissist; “I am better than everyone else, and everyone should work to satisfy my needs.” It is about believing in yourself and trusting yourself and your intentions.

Because the relationship you have with yourself is the only truly life-long relationship, self-love is the most important love of your life.

Why is it important?

Because you can’t share healthy love with others until you love yourself. You may feel love for others, but you may not be able to express it without fear. You may love others and want to relate to them but struggle to receive healthy love if you don’t love yourself first. The exchange of love in a healthy relationship requires concrete self-love.

Because you can’t pour from an empty cup. Think of the effort it takes to give love and affection, be emotionally available, or be thoughtful. If you don’t have reserves of self-love inside, your ability to give love will be diminished.

Because self-love heals past trauma and wounds. Many of us have been through trials in our lives that impacted our mental health, our sense of self, our outlook, and our world view. Often, traumas leave us feeling as though we are worth less than we were before the incident. Cultivating our sense of self-love to come from internal and not external sources allows us to move beyond negative past experiences.

Because once you have self-love, you can set better, healthier, more authentic goals for yourself. How many times have you set a goal for yourself that was rooted in negativity: hating the way your body looked, or feeling powerless at work, or feeling like a “failure” in a hobby or passion? When we love ourselves, we no longer seek to “fix” ourselves with unreasonable standards but instead seek to nourish ourselves. We have more accurate knowledge of our worth and our skills and can adjudicate what would be most beneficial to strive toward.

Most importantly, because you are deserving of the love you give so freely to others. This statement needs no explanation. You are worthy, just as you are, of love.

Self-love involves having the respect and consideration for yourself that you have for (and expect to receive from) others. It should be simple and straightforward, the idea that we treat ourselves at least as well as we treat the people in our lives, but sometimes, it is not. Occasionally, we get hung up or stuck on the idea of how self-love should look or our sense of worth. We want to self-love, but we struggle to do so. 

There are three widespread barriers to self-love.

What gets in the way of self-love?

1) When the inner critic disapproves of your every move :

Your inner critic is the voice in your head that judges, criticizes, and mocks your every move. When the inner critic is loud and powerful, you are your own worst enemy. It hits you where it hurts: the mistake you made when parenting, or when you were leading the meeting at work, and it won’t let it go. It can be challenging to put the inner critic away, as it tends to feed itself: you make a mistake, the inner critic talks to you about it, you’re flustered and unable to let it go, your outlook changes, your mood drops, you say something unkind or thoughtless because you’re in a bad mood, the inner critic gets louder, you’re stressed out, the inner critic gets even louder… It has a snowball effect.  

When you are unable to silence your inner critic, you carry your inner critic with you from place to place, event to event.

2) When you have high expectations of yourself:

There is a difference between having standards and having expectations that are too high. Standards can be a tool of self-love; “I will not tolerate being spoken to disrespectfully,” or “I expect the people in my life to respect my boundaries.” Putting pressure on yourself to meet impossible standards is the opposite. 

When you have unrealistic expectations, you ultimately can not attain them or sustain them. You then feel like a failure or inadequate. When our expectations are too high, we set ourselves up to “fail” and begin to punish ourselves for not measuring up. It is hard to feel grace towards ourselves when we feel like we are just not enough. It is hard to be patient with ourselves when we feel like we should have already achieved a goal. It is hard to allow ourselves rest and relaxation when we don’t think we have excelled at a task or project. When we de-value ourselves over our perceived shortcomings, we then struggle to show ourselves kindness and care.

3) When it was not modeled for you:

As with everything in life, self-love is a skill you can learn. Our early life experiences have a great impact on the way we experience and practice self-love. I once read a great quote online that said, “Be careful with the way you speak to your child; it becomes their inner voice.”  

If you were spoken with love and compassion as a child, you have a much easier time internalizing love and self-love. If you did not grow up in an environment with kind voices or a self-destructive parent raised you, it can be difficult to navigate loving yourself as an adult, but it is not impossible! The beauty of self-love is that you already have tons of kindness inside you because you give it to the people around you. There is nothing wrong with you if you are struggling with self-love. As adults, for us to have self-love and compassion, we need to be taught. From there, as with all skills, we need to practice.

The great thing about putting self-love into practice is that understanding why we may struggle with self-love and where those struggles may have originated is already an act of self-love. By reflecting on our experiences and habits, we are doing the kind of work that allows us to have compassion for ourselves, and compassion is an essential ingredient for honest love.

Once we are aware that we need more love for ourselves, we can begin to overcome the obstacles that stand in our way with tools that can be used at any time, in any place. When we put these tools to use, we not only treat ourselves with love and care on the inside but begin to express that self-love to the world. Our thoughts become our actions, which become our behavior. Our behavior dictates our standards, and we (and others) are compelled to meet them.

How do you engage in self-love? 3 Tools to practice and strengthen your self-love!

1) Talk to yourself the way you talk to someone you love:

Think of the things you say to yourself when you are frustrated, upset, or embarrassed. Now imagine saying those things to a loved one like a friend, partner, or family member. Would you? Now imagine that friend, partner, or family member is sitting opposite you, saying those negative things about him/her/themself. How would you respond? 

Dr. David Burns has a tool called “the double standard” in his book “The Feeling Good Handbook.” He suggests that you can pretend someone you love is having the same negative self-talk you are having right now. Pretend they were saying those thoughts to you and write down how you would respond to them. 

This is a great tool because it works on more than one level: the first thing it does is stop the thoughts in their tracks when you imagine these angry or unfair words about a loved one. Would I speak to a friend this way? No. Would I be comfortable hearing a friend talk about him/her/themself this way? No. As we discussed above, negative self-talk can begin to spiral and become unmanageable. Nipping it in the bud can help to rein it in a little. Whether or not you have a lot of time to address the talk and analyze what you might say to a friend in a similar situation, you have successfully paused the narrative. This is when the next level of this tool sets in unpacking what was said and responding with kindness. Even if you don’t have the time to debrief the incident right at that moment fully, you can return to it later when you are in a safe space to do so.

2) Self-care:

You might think that you will be unable to provide yourself with self-care until you are a professional at self-live, but this is not the case. Acts of self-care inform your mindset, the way actions that lead to behaviors always do.   

You may think that self-care is “a spa day” or involves being selfish, but that is not true. Self-care is simply any action that is taken with the intent of meeting your needs, whether they’re physical or emotional. It is not selfish to practice self-care because it brings the best version of you to the world. You cannot pour from an empty cup. You need to learn to fill up your cup; if you are not well, nothing and no one around you will be well. 

While it is true that, for some, a trip to the spa is their ultimate act of self-care, there are many more acts of self-care that can be taken. You can phone a friend or loved one to chat or do a quick meditation. You can go for a walk or watch a YouTube video about unlikely animal friendships. You can set a sleep schedule for yourself. You can learn to cook your favorite dish. You can write a list of self-care acts that you would enjoy and work on checking off every item on your list! Watch a movie. Drink more water. Make a list of the things in your life that you are grateful for. Pour yourself a bubble bath, light a bunch of candles, and put on your favorite podcast. The possibilities are endless, and they’re all correct, as long as they work for you.

3) Boundaries:

One of the best ways to grow our self-love is to be able to self-advocate. In standing firm in and expressing our needs, we provide ourselves with care and respect. Setting boundaries with ourselves and others is a great way to communicate and strive for our needs. 

Boundaries start with identifying what they are and then asserting them. The process of identification affirms our worth of having them in the first place; it is through knowledge of our worth that we nurture the support and compassion we deserve to give to ourselves. Taking the time and making an effort to stick to our boundaries is ongoing self-care. When we set boundaries, we define our values and clarify our goals; we know what is important, and we know ourselves well enough to be realistic about our purpose. 

When our boundaries are expressed to others, the end result is that we find ourselves surrounded by people who respect us, fostering an environment of respect that we have the emotional support to uphold. A boundary is a protection of sorts; when we establish and enforce a boundary, we protect ourselves. Think of the people in your life about whom you feel protective. You know that part of the reason you work to protect them is that you love them. Protecting ourselves in healthy ways, through selected boundaries, is showing ourselves, love.

When we are working at utilizing our self-love engagement tools, it is important to keep in mind that sometimes it might be harder to express our self-love than others. When this happens, we can remind ourselves that “love” and “like” are two separate things: you probably always love your best friend, even if sometimes you don’t like their behavior, or you feel frustrated that they’re not making as much time for you right now. Self-love is the same: expressing and practicing it might sometimes feel like more of a challenge or more of a struggle to find the love at all. But as is the case with your friendship, you know that there is always love there. Remind yourself of the same thing: even at times when you struggle to utilize the tools at hand, or you feel like it’s dwindled, that love does live inside of you. Be kind to and patient with yourself; nurture your self-love gently.

A year ago, we might not have been able to foresee spending so much time with ourselves. Whether you have been alone in lockdown or sharing space with only one other person or working within a much smaller bubble, the fact is that we have been less “busy” socially. As a result of this, we have had far fewer emotional distractions; external validation and stimulation have dropped significantly for most of us. This time has probably brought to light some introspection and self-analysis. 

Self-love doesn’t mean that you are perfectly content to be alone; self-love allows your inner peace with your thoughts. If the past twelve months have taught us anything, it is that the only guaranteed company we keep throughout our lives is ourselves. Our thoughts and feelings about ourselves won’t always be glowing and joyful, but the work we do to have kindness and compassion for ourselves is immeasurably beneficial.

Embracing You Therapy Group Practice

Here at Embracing You Therapy, we invite you to explore with us how life would be different if you had more control over your thoughts and emotions, and we invite you to consider that it is possible to accept things just as they are, embracing imperfections to create a gentler place for calm in your life.

Let’s learn what drives your unique perspective on anxiety and stress. Then, let’s find the tools-your unique tools-that help you respond to life in a healthy, calm way. Contact us today for your complimentary 15-minute phone consultation with one of our Client Care Coordinators.

Latest Blogs

5 Best Date Ideas For Better Connection In Your Couple’s Relationship

Do I Have Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder?

Are You Struggling With Decision Fatigue?

address 21031 Ventura Blvd, Suite 316 Woodland Hills, CA 91364

Share This Blog

Contact Form

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Contact Info

• call us (818) 741-1319
• [email protected]
• Address 21031 Ventura Blvd, Suite 316, Woodland Hills, CA 91364

© 2022 – Embracing You Therapy – Privacy Policy – Terms of Service

Browse By Category

Interiors & decor, fashion & style, health & wellness, relationships, w&d product, food & entertaining, travel & leisure, career development, book a consultation, amazon shop, shop my home, designing a life well-lived, how i learned to love myself, relationships, wit & delight lives where life and style intersect., more about us ›.

Interiors & Decor

Fashion & Style

Health & Wellness

Most popular, how writing a personal contract improved my life (and tips for creating your own), i’ve remodeled 3 kitchens—these are my biggest design regrets in each one, 3 ways to optimize your closet (plus, a tour of my new closet space).

I pitched this title. It seemed like a good idea at the time. And now I’m staring at my laptop thinking, “Wait.  Do  I love myself?”

Because I definitely don’t love everything about me. And I don’t walk around with some sort of effortless self-love flowing through my veins. So… WHO AM I TO WRITE THIS ARTICLE?

But, then again, I’ve spent 15 years (and a small fortune on therapy) learning to love myself. My life has transformed because of it. I know what loving myself looks like, I know generally how to do it, and I can honestly say that I show love to myself at least as often as I don’t, which is basically twice as often as I used to. All of that to say, this story is written by a person who’s still on the journey.

But along the way, there are four things I’ve learned about loving myself (so far):

1. I HAVE A SELF.

I know, I know. This might sound annoyingly meta. Or maybe just silly. But, for me, it was a critical thing to learn.

Obviously, I knew I existed. What I didn’t know is where I stopped and someone else started. I knew who I was only in relation to other people—I was a daughter, a friend, a girlfriend; then later, an employee, a wife, etc. Very rarely did I think of myself as just  me .

Plus, I was dangerously unaware of what was actually going on in my half of any given relationship. When asked how I felt, or what I wanted, I’d be at a loss to respond. What did the other person want? That’s what I was good at.

It’s understandable how I got to that point.

I’m wired for relationship. It’s one of my highest values and greatest pleasures. I throw myself in, deeply, and I tend to do almost anything to protect it. If I’m not careful, I can lose my “self” in the process.

On top of this, I grew up in a religious setting that emphasized selflessness. I now understand that this is about living a life of sacrifice. It’s about releasing control to a power greater than yourself. But, somehow, the way I heard “ Be selfless.”  was: “ Have no self .” Which fit right in with the way I’m wired and created an endless spiral of self-obliviousness.

For me, the first step to learning to love myself was learning to notice myself. It was a slow process of peeling my identity away from the others I had glued it to. Over time, I learned:

– I am not my family. – I am not my relationships. – I am not what people think of me. – I am not my failures. – I am not my successes.

I am myself. Regardless.

Which led to my next discovery.

2. MY  SELF  DESERVES LOVE.

I’ll be honest. My default setting toward myself is, at best, tolerance, and, at worst, merciless judgment. Left unchecked, I talk to myself with a toxic combination of scolding-mother and disdainful-teen. ( Why am I so stinkin’ sensitive? Why did I say that dumb thing? How could I possibly lose my cell phone in the house again? Why can’t I keep the bathroom floor clean? Sheesh my hair is ridiculous.)

These voices are so natural and familiar to me that, for a long while, I didn’t realize they existed. But one day, my therapist asked if I would speak to another person the way I talk to myself and I was mortified:  Are you kidding?! Never.

It began to dawn on me how damaging it would be for any person to listen to a never-ending monologue about how incapable, frustrating, dense, unattractive, and abnormal she is. Yet this is what I had subjected myself to for years.

I began to wonder what might happen if I changed that voice.

I starting paying attention to how I talk to the people I love, like my friends and my kids. When the healthy, loving people in my life talked to me, I began to listen more closely. I heard kindness and compassion in those voices. I noticed grace for mistakes and a genuine sense of care. And I started trying, as much as possible, to emulate those voices when talking to myself.

This led to my biggest discovery about loving myself.

3. LOVE ISN’T A FEELING.

Just as is true for anyone else I love, loving myself doesn’t mean I always feel like I’m the most amazing person on the planet. It doesn’t mean I’m completely enamored by everything I do, or everything I am.

Instead… – Love is the voice I choose to speak to myself with. – Love is the way I treat myself. – Love is protecting myself from things and people that aren’t good for me. – Love is surrounding myself with nourishing things. – Love is believing in myself. – Love is never giving up on myself.

Love isn’t a feeling. It’s a choice.

And, miraculously, when that choice is made consistently, sometimes it also becomes a feeling.

4. IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT ME.

So why is this even important? Is self-love just a veiled excuse for selfishness? Is it all just a bunch of self-help baloney? All I can tell you is how it’s mattered in my own life:

Loving myself has prevented me from expecting other people to carry that weight for me. It helps protect me from crushing disappointment when they can’t. It keeps me from settling for things/people/habits that are harmful to me. And loving myself allows me to do a relationship from a full place vs. an empty one.

Most of all though, when I am able to love myself – the person that I have been most judgmental of, the person who annoys me more than anyone else – then I truly am able to love others. And I know how to let them love me.

HOW LOVE LOOKED TODAY

As I’ve been writing this piece, it’s been a challenging few days. My mind has been foggy, my heart heavy, and my body drained. I wasn’t sure why, and I found myself feeling frustrated, willing myself to feel “normal.” Which only left me feeling more discouraged, of course.

Finally  (sometimes it still takes me a minute), I paid attention to what I might actually be needing. I gave myself a nap, took myself on a walk, got myself some deep breaths of fresh air, fed myself some organic beets, cut myself some slack, talked to a friend, and, eventually, realized I’m grieving some things. I pointed out to myself there are some actual real reasons for feeling a little off this week. And I changed the voices in my head from scolding and impatient to soothing and compassionate.

For me, that’s what loving myself looked like today. And I have to say, it helped.

Image sources:  1  /  2

Julie Rybarczyk is a freelance writer, fair-weather blogger, and empty-nester mama who’s living alone and liking it . She’s perpetually the chilliest person in Minneapolis—so most of the year you’ll find her under layers of wool, behind steaming cups of tea. Or on the socials at @shortsandlongs.

BY Julie Rybarczyk - December 4, 2018

Like what you see? Share Wit & Delight with a friend: 

“Love isn’t a feeling, it’s a choice.” This!! So important to remember when it comes to loving yourself as well as anyone else. I realized that with my first love when there were tough times to get through: sometimes you have to decide to love them. And it applies to loving ourselves the same way 🙂

Teresa | outlandishblog.com

very strong essay!

I agree with everything you wrote, but I want to share your advice. Never compare yourself with others, because it always causes a feeling of non-self-sufficiency and self-judgment. Never chase others and strive to be who you are not! You cannot live someone else’s life. Do not try to be like everyone else. Be yourself and go beyond your limits, expand your comfort zone. Who can you compare with? The only person you have to compare yourself with is yourself! I got it from college and my life has improved! Now I work at Write My Essay Online and help …  Read more »

Lovely post and a message to people who are having a hard time with self love, people put on a front and they might seem like they love themselves but in reality and in a horrible place, and this just shines some light on how you can help yourself

Love this article! I wish those people who have committed suicide could read this article once. We are weak inside and that’s the reason we couldn’t survive our lives. We need to start loving ourselves and don’t expect the others. A lot of people live in anxiety which causes health issues and migraine. To come out from this situation we need to learn how to enjoy every second of our life. You can find a lot of blogs on Buy cheap essay sites about self-beliefs.

Yet loving yourself is basic to your self-awareness, to the satisfaction you had always wanted Write My Assignment , and to create healthy, happy relationships with others. Rather than attempting to simply talk yourself into trusting you have self-love.

The blog post is great. The article talks about relationships. You can understand How I Learned to Love Myself by Julie Rybarczyk. There are many things that you are required to do in order to love yourself. Do you know the important things that you should look at to love yourself? The article mentions four things about loving yourself.

It’s amazing. I totally agree with you. Sometimes we forget that we need to love ourselves. And it’s so important to recognize the essential feelings which we must have. Thanks a lot for this piece of writing. By the way, if you need help with writing tasks, you can read more about what I’m doing on https://essays-lab.net/term-paper-writing/ .

Hello everyone, it was interesting to read your article. Usually i’m reading New York Times (it’s here, if u want to check it out https://www.nytimes.com ), but now i’ll read your site too!

Look here https://samedaypaper.org/blog/reflection-paper if you wanna know how to write a reflection paper. You have made some mistakes.

This article is one of the best I have read on this site. I hope many readers will take advantage of your tips and look at themselves with new experiences. I have time for such discussions thanks https://essaysleader.com/essay-about-yourself/

Most-read posts:

Did you know W&D now has a resource library of  Printable Art, Templates, Freebies, and more?

take me there 

Get our best w&d resources, for designing a life well-lived.

5 Powerful Daily Journaling Prompts for Processing Your Emotions

Kate’s Picks: 11 Things I Tried and Loved Lately

7 Versatile Spring Wardrobe Basics to Add to Your Closet in 2024

7 of My Favorite Winter-to-Spring Outfits I’ve Worn Lately

8 Quick and Easy Spring Decor Ideas That Will Refresh Your Home

6 Mindset Shifts That Have Changed My Life for the Better

More stories.

Thank you for being here. For being open to enjoying life’s simple pleasures and looking inward to understand yourself, your neighbors, and your fellow humans! I’m looking forward to chatting with you.

Hi, I'm Kate. Welcome to my happy place.

ABOUT WIT & DELIGHT

follow  @WITANDDELIGHT

A LIFE THAT

Follow us on instagram @witanddelight_, designing a life well-lived.

fashion & style

Get our best resources.

Did you know W&D now offers Digital Art, Templates, Freebies, & MORE?

legal & Privacy

Wait, wait, take me there.

Site Credit

Accessibility STatement

Speech on Self Love

Self-love is like a seed planted within you. It’s all about cherishing who you are, embracing your unique qualities, and appreciating your own worth. It’s the way you treat yourself in your quiet moments, and how you navigate the world around you.

When you start loving yourself, you build a more positive outlook. You feel confident, content, and ready to face life’s challenges. This is the beauty and power of self-love.

1-minute Speech on Self Love

Good day, everyone.

Today, we are here to talk about a very important topic – ‘Self Love.’ It’s not about being selfish or self-centered, it’s about taking care of ourselves. Just like we water a plant so it can grow, we need to love ourselves to grow as a person.

First, let’s understand what self-love is. It’s like being your own best friend. It’s about accepting who you are, the way you are. It’s about being happy with yourself, your qualities, your faults, everything. We all make mistakes, but we should not forget to forgive ourselves. That’s self-love.

Second, why is self-love so important? Well, when we love ourselves, we feel good. We feel happy. And when we are happy, we can make others happy too. When we love ourselves, we take care of our body, our mind, our heart. That way, we can stay healthy and strong.

But, how can we love ourselves? It’s not very hard. We can start by doing things that make us happy. It could be playing a game, reading a book, painting, anything. We should take out time for what we love. We should also keep saying positive things to ourselves, like “I am good”, “I can do this”, because words have a lot of power.

In the end, I want to say, loving ourselves is a journey, not a destination. So, let’s embark on this journey today. Let’s promise to be kind and gentle with ourselves. Let’s promise to love ourselves, because we are special, we are unique, we are worth it.

Also check:

• Essay on Self Love

2-minute Speech on Self Love

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, today we speak about a topic that is often overlooked, yet very important – self love. Now, what is self love? It is the act of caring about ourselves, just like we care about our favourite toy or our best friend. It’s looking in the mirror and saying, “I am good, I am important, and I matter.”

Let’s start with why self love is important. When we love ourselves, we feel happy. We feel strong, like we can do anything. We also feel good about the people around us. It makes us want to help others and be kind. When we love ourselves, we can spread that love to everyone we meet.

But how do we learn to love ourselves? It might seem hard, but it’s not. Start by looking at the things you are good at. Maybe you’re a great dancer, or you’re good at math, or you can run very fast. Remember those things. They’re a part of who you are, and they’re things to be proud of.

And what about the things you’re not so good at? That’s okay too. Nobody is perfect. When you make a mistake, don’t get upset. Instead, think about what you can learn from it. Mistakes are not bad. They help us grow. They help us become better.

Now, let’s talk about feelings. Sometimes, we feel sad or angry. That’s normal. It’s okay to have feelings, and it’s okay to express them. Don’t hide your feelings. Instead, understand them, learn from them, and let them guide you. Your feelings are a part of you, and they deserve your love too.

Finally, remember to take care of your body. Eat healthy foods. Get plenty of rest. Play outside. Your body works hard for you every day, and it deserves your care and respect.

In conclusion, self love is not about being selfish, or only caring about yourself. It’s about understanding yourself, accepting yourself, and taking care of yourself. When we love ourselves, we can love others too. So, let’s promise today, to show ourselves a little more love, every single day. Because you, yes you, are worth it.

• Speech on Self Improvement
• Speech on Self Government Day
• Speech on Secularism

We also have speeches on more interesting topics that you may want to explore.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

• Bipolar Disorder
• Therapy Center
• When To See a Therapist
• Types of Therapy
• Best Online Therapy
• Best Couples Therapy
• Best Family Therapy
• Managing Stress
• Sleep and Dreaming
• Understanding Emotions
• Self-Improvement
• Healthy Relationships
• Student Resources
• Personality Types
• Guided Meditations
• Verywell Mind Insights
• 2023 Verywell Mind 25
• Mental Health in the Classroom
• Editorial Process
• Meet Our Review Board
• Crisis Support

7 Ways to Practice Self-Love

Barbara is a writer and speaker who is passionate about mental health, overall wellness, and women's issues.

Ivy Kwong, LMFT, is a psychotherapist specializing in relationships, love and intimacy, trauma and codependency, and AAPI mental health.  

Marko Geber / Getty Images

What Is Self-Love?

How to practice self-love.

Having self-love involves having an appreciation and respect for yourself. That includes taking care of your physical and mental health. Although most people are busy, it's important to take time to nourish yourself and treat yourself with the love and kindness you deserve.

Self-love is having regard for our own well-being and contentment according to the American Psychological Association.

While self-care proponents suggest taking baths and getting massages, loving yourself goes much deeper than splurging once in a while on pleasures like these.

Self-love should be a daily activity in which you check in with yourself and treat yourself the way we treat loved ones.

The Brain and Behavior Research Foundation says that self-love comes from actions that support physical, psychological, and spiritual growth.

What Self-Love Is Not

Some critics think self-love is a modern concept and is merely self-indulgence. They view self-love as excessively focusing on yourself and akin to narcissism . But self-love is not about having a grandiose sense of self or being puffed up with self-importance. Self-love means taking care of your needs and recognizing that you have value.

The Importance of Self-Love

Your first relationship is with yourself and it’s the foundation of relationships with others. Loving yourself enables you to live in alignment with your values and to make healthy choices in your everyday decisions.  Confidence , self-respect, self-worth, and self-love are all interconnected. As we deepen in love for ourselves, we can deepen the love we share with others.

Sometimes it’s hard to assert yourself and think about your own needs. While it might be considerate to practice self-love here and there, it's important to make it a daily practice .

Here’s how to incorporate self-love into your lifestyle.

Prioritize Your Well-Being and Mental Health 

Your physical and mental health are directly correlated and how you feel physically can influence how you feel mentally and emotionally. When you begin loving and caring for your body, you’re directly and positively influencing your mental health, too.  Eating and sleeping well  is important in maintaining well-being and warding off illness. That means choosing healthy foods and getting adequate sleep every night.

Exercising regularly has a positive impact on your overall health as exercise decreases cortisol, the stress hormone, in your body.

Remember to give yourself time to take care of and value yourself. Struggling with mental health issues might require visiting a therapist, choosing online therapy , or turning to an app .

Embrace Self-Compassion

When you acknowledge your mistakes and accept your imperfections with kindness and without judgment, you exhibit  self-compassion . Dr. Kristin Neff’s widely accepted definition of self-compassion has three components:

• Self-kindness : feeling kindness toward ourselves rather than judgment, criticism, or shame
• Common humanity : recognizing we are part of a common humanity as everyone makes mistakes rather than viewing ourselves as isolated beings unworthy of love and belonging
• Mindfulness : viewing mistakes mindfully by having a perspective and not over-identifying with our failings

In a pilot study on self-compassion, scientists empirically tested the use of a writing intervention to determine if these self-compassion components influenced each other. Findings showed that the three components do mutually enhance each other.

Don’t Compare Yourself to Other People

When we are jealous of our friend’s promotion or feel we are lacking because we gained ten pounds while our neighbor is in great shape, it’s hard not to feel down. Social comparisons can cause stress. Comparison and competition may motivate you in ways that are helpful and not harmful. More often than not, they diminish us by causing stress, anxiety, guilt, and shame.

Social media has affected our mental health in not-so-great ways. We judge ourselves more harshly on a regular basis and don't feel good enough.  High social media use has been linked to depression.

Set Boundaries

Drawing the line helps with stress management . Sometimes you have to say 'no' at work or to your family to preserve your energy. One-sided relationships have unequal distribution of energy, control, and thoughtfulness. Recognize your needs and carve out time to be thoughtful about yourself by setting boundaries.

Forgive Yourself

Cultivate ways to stop self-loathing in any form. Forgive yourself for your past mistakes and find ways to heal. To incorporate self-love in your daily life, don’t ruminate over mistakes and regrets. Rather than blame yourself for things that were probably out of your control anyway, turn to self-forgiveness.

A recent study finds that greater forgiveness is linked to less stress and a decrease in mental health symptoms.

Surround Yourself With Supportive, Loving people

Having social support is vital. You could reach out to receive your  family’s love  for you but if those relationships are strained or they’re not in the picture, invest in relationships with your friends and community and allow yourself to receive care and support from them.

Let go of toxic, draining, and one-way friendships. The goal is to fortify yourself with healthy interactions and people who believe in you, champion you, and support you in becoming more of who you are and want to be, not less.

If you think you’re in love  but aren’t sure, remember that healthy relationships involve intimacy and deep emotional connection. Invest your time, energy, and care into platonic and romantic relationships that support, energize, and restore you.

Change a Negative Mindset

Positive thinking  doesn’t mean ignoring problems. It means choosing to have a positive outlook as an approach to life that includes gratitude and many possibilities. Maybe it’s time to seek support to process your anger and  release resentment and grudges , for example.

Holding onto and fixating on anger and hatred towards others can be damaging to our mental and emotional well-being and it can be an act of self-love and care to address it at the root cause.

Say kind things to yourself.  Positive affirmations  can boost your self-esteem and reduce your social fears. Remind yourself that you’re a kind person doing your best. Changing your perspective and focusing on things that you are grateful for and appreciative of can be immensely uplifting and is another way to practice self-love.

APA Dictionary of Psychology. Self-love .

The Brain and Behavior Research Foundation. Self-love and what it means .

Rudolph DL, McAuley E. Cortisol and affective responses to exercise .  J Sports Sci . 1998;16(2):121-128. doi:10.1080/026404198366830

Self-Compassion: Dr. Kristin Neff. Definition of self-compassion .

Dreisoerner A, Junker NM, van Dick R. The relationship among the components of self-compassion: a pilot study using a compassionate writing intervention to enhance self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness . J Happiness Stud. 2021;22(1):21-47.

Toussaint LL, Shields GS, Slavich GM. Forgiveness, Stress, and Health: a 5-Week Dynamic Parallel Process Study .  Ann Behav Med . 2016;50(5):727-735. doi:10.1007/s12160-016-9796-6

By Barbara Field Barbara is a writer and speaker who is passionate about mental health, overall wellness, and women's issues.

Essays About Myself: Top 5 Essay Examples Plus Prompts

We are all unique individuals, each with traits, skills, and qualities we should be proud of. Here are examples and prompts on essays about myself .

It is good to reflect on ourselves from time to time. When applying for university or a new job, you may be asked to write about yourself to give the institution a better picture of yourself. Self-understanding and reflection are essential if you want to make a compelling argument for yourself.

Reflect on your life: look back on the people you’ve met, the places you’ve been, and the experiences you’ve had, and think about how they have shaped you into the person you have become today. Think of the bigger picture and be sure to consider who you are based on what others think and say about you, not just who you think you are. 

If you are tasked with the prompt, “essays about myself,” keep reading to see some essay examples.

1. It’s My Life by Ann Smith

2. how i see myself by leticia woods, 3. the truth about myself by madeline dyer, 4. what we see in others is a reflection of ourselves by sandra brossman, 5. a letter to myself by gladys mclaughlin, 1. introducing yourself, 2. describing your strengths and weaknesses, 3. what sets you apart from others, 4. your beliefs and values, 5. an experience that has defined you as a person, 6. what family means to you, 7. your favorite pasttime.

“Sure, I’ve had bad experiences in my life too, but this is exactly what made me the way I am now: grateful, full of love, with a desire to study well because it will help me become a successful person in future and have a high quality of life. I believe that it is manifesting day by day and I feel even more responsibility for what I do and where I go. With all I already have, I know that I’m on the right path and I will do my best to inspire others to live the way they feel like living as well.”

In her essay, Smith describes her interests, habits, and qualities. She writes that she is sociable, enthusiastic about studying, and friendly. She also touches on others’ opinions of her- that she is funny. One of Smith’s hobbies is photography, which allowed her to meet her best friend. She aims to study hard so she can be successful on whatever path she may follow, and inspire others to live their best life. 

“It is this drive that will carry me through my degree program and allow me to absorb the education that I receive and develop solid practical applications from this knowledge. I feel that I will eventually become highly successful in my chosen field because my past has clearly shown my commitment to excellence in every endeavor that I have chosen. Because I remain incredibly focused and committed for future success, I know that my future will be as rewarding as my past.”

Woods discusses how her identity helps her achieve her career goals. First, her commitment to her education is a great asset. Second, prior education and her service in the US Air Force allowed her to learn much about life, the world, and herself, and she was able to learn about different cultures. She believes that experience, devotion, and knowledge will allow her to achieve her dreams. 

“I’m getting better as I recover from the brain inflammation which caused my OCD, but I want to have a day like that. A day where I can relax and enjoy life fully again. A day where I haven’t a care in the world. And for that, I need to be kind to myself. I need to relax and remove any pressure I place on myself.”

Dyer reflects on an important part of herself- her Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Brain inflammation has made her a perfectionist, and she cannot relax. She is constantly compelled by an inner voice to do things she “should” be doing. She wants to be happy, and will try to shut off this voice by practicing self-affirmation. You might also be interested in these essays about discovering yourself .

“Believe it or not, forgiving YOURSELF is the most effective way to disengage from negative interactions with people.  We can only love and accept others to the degree that we love and accept ourselves.  When you make it a habit to learn from your relationships, eventually you will discover that you can observe negative traits within others without judgment and without getting hooked into someone else’s drama.”

In her essay, Brossman writes how we see what we desire for ourselves in others. Our relationships help us understand ourselves better; we see people’s bad qualities and criticize them, professing that we will not be like them. On the other hand, we see qualities we like and try to imitate them. To become a better version of yourself, you should learn from your relationships and emulate desirable qualities. 

“I never tell anyone that I am tired of work or study. Success will come to those who get up and go far. This is my life motto which always reminds me of how vital it is to be hard-working and resilient towards failures. I learn that no matter what others say (even mother and father) if their

thoughts contradict my goals, I don’t have to listen to them. Nobody will live your life, and nobody should tell you who you are and what you are.”

Mclaughlin writes a letter to her future self, explaining what she envisions for herself in the coming years. She writes about who she is now and describes her vision for how much better she will be in the future. She believes that she will have great encounters that will teach her about life, a loving, kind family, and an independent spirit that will triumph over all her struggles

Writing Prompts For Essays About Myself

Write a basic description of yourself; describe where you live, your school or job, and your family and friends. You should also give readers a glimpse of your personality- are you outgoing, shy, or sporty? If you want to write more, you can also briefly explain your hobbies, interests, and skills. 

Each of us has our own strengths and weaknesses. Reflect on what you are good at and what you can improve on and select 1-2 from each to write about. Discuss what you can do to work on your weaknesses and improve yourself. 

An essential part of yourself is your uniqueness; for a strong essay about “myself,” think about beliefs, qualities, or values that set you apart from others. Write about one or more, but be sure to explain your choices clearly. You can write about what separates you in the context of your family, friend group, culture, or even society as a whole. 

Your beliefs and values are at the core of your being, as they guide the decisions you make every day. Discuss some of your basic beliefs and values and explain why they are important to you. For a stronger essay, be sure to explain how you use these in day-to-day life; give concrete examples of situations in which these beliefs and values are used. 

We are all shaped by our past experiences. Reflect on an experience, whether that be an achievement, setback, or just a fun memory, and explain its significance to you. Retell the story in detail and describe how it has impacted you and helped make you the person you are today. 

More often than not, family plays a big role in forming us. To give readers a better idea of your identity, describe your idea of family. Discuss its significance, impact, and role in your life. You may also choose to write about how your family has helped shape you into who you are. This should be based on personal experience; refrain from using external sources to inspire you.

Our likes and dislikes are an important part of who we are as well; in your essay, discuss a hobby of yours, preferably one you have been interested in for a long period of time, and explain why you enjoy it so much. You should also write about how it has helped you become yourself and made you a better person.  

Grammarly is one of our top grammar checkers. Find out why in this Grammarly review . If you’re stuck picking your next essay topic, check out our round-up of essay topics about education .

Martin is an avid writer specializing in editing and proofreading. He also enjoys literary analysis and writing about food and travel.

View all posts

Self-Esteem

Reflections on loving yourself, loving affirmation of ourselves means to always regard ourselves as persons..

Posted May 31, 2023 | Reviewed by Davia Sills

• What Is Self-Esteem?
• Find counselling near me
• People talk a lot about self-love these days, because it has become so difficult to put into practice.
• The popular therapeutic literature offers advice to those who are struggling but fails to define self-love.
• Regarding one's self as a person provides specific orientations for thinking about what self-love requires.

Love of self is not a new concern. Granted, we now have sprawling popular literatures on self-love, self-esteem , and related concepts, most of which are of fairly recent vintage. During the entire 1970s, Psychology Today published just one article on self-esteem. 1 It seems as though the importance of self-love has only recently been discovered.

Not so. Aristotle pointedly took up self-love in his discussion of friendship in Ethics . The second great commandment, first set down in the Book of Leviticus, enjoined the faithful to “love thy neighbor as thyself ,” and as the German philosopher Josef Pieper once noted, both Augustine of Hippo and Thomas Aquinas made the point that “the love we bear ourselves” is the root and measure of our love of others. 2 A tradition of reflection in this vein has persisted down through the centuries.

So why are we talking so volubly about self-love now? It is not because we have discovered something new about it, I would suggest, but because it has become so difficult to put into practice. Indeed, if there is one discontent that rises above all the others in our time, it is our inability to love ourselves as we should.

Struggles With Self-Worth

In my interviews and discussions with people, they typically speak of their distress as a kind of protest against who they are. They are not successful in being “somebody.” They are failing to stand out or reach their goals . They feel worthless, undeserving, or even guilty for not doing more. They wish they were someone they could feel good about, someone who merited their love and respect.

Similar judgments of personal inadequacy are a pervasive theme in self-help and popular therapeutic writing. Many authors discuss self-love in the context of a serious struggle on the part of readers, primarily women, with “ shame -based beliefs,” “comparison-based self-criticism,” a “distorted body image ,” and other painful feelings and challenges.

The Self-Love Workbook for Women , for example, currently a top title on the Amazon self-esteem list, defines self-love in terms of a set of beliefs and practices. All other sources I consulted said virtually the same. Self-love, according to the Workbook , means to

• Accept yourself as you are, with your flaws and imperfections, avoiding self-judgment and extending kindness and forgiveness to yourself.
• Make space and time to put yourself first
• Set healthy boundaries and prioritize self-care

Given that self-worth has become the object of endless and seemingly unsuccessful struggle, such therapeutic advice seems understandable. Cut yourself some slack, it says. Yet the advice fails to provide a definition of what self-love really is.

Regard for Ourselves as Persons

In On Love , the philosopher Pieper offers a provocative thought: “It seems to me crucial that in loving affirmation of ourselves, we always regard ourselves as persons , that is, as beings existing for their own sake.”

Perhaps that sounds obvious, but I think his point about people is significant. It helps us to think about specific orientations that self-love requires, three of which I will mention.

First, self-love requires that we relate to ourselves as subjects, not objects. We “think and judge,” to quote Pieper again, “in terms of our own impulses, fears, and goals, our inner motivations.” We do not, in other words, disconnect our experience from our desires, our purposes, our commitments, and our real-world circumstances. Rather than see them as alien, we understand and deal with our actions and our emotions as our own.

That is easier said than done, of course. The widespread medicalization of everyday suffering, of which I have written extensively, has driven out the ordinary ways in which people speak about their struggles. It has conditioned us to think and speak in terms of diagnostic concepts such as depression , anxiety , and attention deficit or in the popularized language of chemically driven brain disorders. Through such medicalized terms, our painful experiences—with their own unique histories and existential specificity—are disconnected from us. We are little more than objects or even “hosts” of various impersonal forces.

Another common form of self-estrangement—the tendency to view ourselves as a mere means to an end—is even more insidious. Such alienation is hard to combat because it often arises from the way we are treated by others. We are valued not for ourselves but only for our usefulness or achievements or personal qualities. Over time, as we learn that nothing about us—whether our character, our talents, or the work we have done—matters in itself, we come to think of ourselves in the same instrumental terms.

College students, for instance, whose every activity has been organized from a young age for maximum educational success, sometimes speak of such self-alienation. They have little idea of who they are, and recognition of that fact, they say, came only after something unpredictable happened, some jarring failure or life-changing experience.

Second, self-love, as the therapeutic literature emphasizes, requires active acceptance of ourselves, however challenging that has become. Each of us is unique, with a certain temperament and personality , strong and weak points, potentialities as well as limitations. Regarding ourselves as persons means accepting our whole reality. It means to wish to be who we are and not someone else.

But such self-acceptance cannot be, as the Workbook and many other sources say, unconditional. Our approval cannot extend to things we do that are wrong. Self-love cannot be mere self-satisfaction. We must remain discontented with our faults and imperfections. Otherwise, we do not take our own dignity seriously. We deny our capacity for growth and moral development. Our relation to ourselves, rather than being one of love, becomes an “echo,” to use sociologist Hartmut Rosa’s apt term for a relationship that is nonresponsive or indifferent. 3 Self-improvement is frustratingly slow. Not “forgiveness,” but patience is the requisite virtue.

Third, and finally, self-love means recognizing and embracing our need for love. Persons are not solitary selves, independent of relationships with other persons and our being in the world. Love has the character of a gift, not self-conferred but received. It implies an openness , allowing ourselves to be touched and moved by others. It implies vulnerability and a willingness to make ourselves vulnerable.

The therapeutic literature seems to imagine something different. Many authors treat self-love as though it were a kind of personal self-sufficiency. The solution they offer to being too dependent or needy or trying to earn love with accomplishments or abilities is to cultivate autonomy from others. If we just love ourselves and insist on our boundaries, they imply, we can gain a kind of control. We won’t care what others think of us and can, as necessary, give ourselves all we really need.

Drawing in on ourselves in self-protection is understandable. But it isn’t self-love. It is another form of self-estrangement. We may gain some instrumental control over our circumstances but at the expense of our longing to love and be loved.

With all the forces of our world leaving people feeling unworthy and inadequate, we might begin to push back by learning to think of ourselves not as conditions or projects but as irreducible persons deserving and capable of love.

1. Ronald W. Dworkin. “Psychotherapy and the Pursuit of Happiness.” The New Atlantis , Spring 2012: 69-83.

2. Josef Pieper, On Love , reprinted in Faith, Hope, Love . San Francisco: Ignatius Press, 1997.

3. Hartmut Rosa, Resonance . Medford, MA: Polity, 2019.

Joseph E. Davis is Research Professor of Sociology and Director of the Picturing the Human Colloquy of the Institute for Advanced Studies in Culture at the University of Virginia.

• Find a Therapist
• Find a Treatment Center
• Find a Psychiatrist
• Find a Support Group
• Find Online Therapy
• International
• New Zealand
• South Africa
• Switzerland
• Asperger's
• Bipolar Disorder
• Chronic Pain
• Eating Disorders
• Passive Aggression
• Personality
• Goal Setting
• Positive Psychology
• Stopping Smoking
• Low Sexual Desire
• Relationships
• Child Development
• Therapy Center NEW
• Diagnosis Dictionary
• Types of Therapy

Understanding what emotional intelligence looks like and the steps needed to improve it could light a path to a more emotionally adept world.

• Coronavirus Disease 2019
• Affective Forecasting
• Neuroscience

100 Things I Love About Myself

A Word About Self-Love  Many years ago, a therapist challenged me to name 5 things I loved about myself that had nothing to do with my job or me taking care of everybody else in my life. I sat there for a while, and then burst into tears, because I could not name even one! But that day and many others like it became a driving force behind my self-love and self-care journey. A journey which actually became my career. For the past 15 years, I’ve been a self-care, self-love,  and wellbeing researcher, speaker, and author, empowering thousands of women all over the world to rewrite their stories, discover happiness, purpose, and inner peace through a life-changing power of true self-love. And in this blog post, I’ll not only share  my  100 Things I About Myself, but true and proven tools on how you can get to 100 Things You Love About Yourself as well.

Why is It So Hard to Love Ourselves?

Over the years, I’ve asked thousands of people to name 5 things they love about themselves, and although the answers vary, common denominator stays the same-the answers don’t come easy. 

When i do this exercise in my workshops, women often get emotional just like i did, because it’s really hard for them to not only find things about themselves that they love but also they get to the realization that they cannot even imagine where to start with fostering self-love. this is completely normal and expected., as women, we’ve been so trained by our society to focus on others, their needs, and desires, that we often start out our self-love journey not knowing our self-love and self-care needs at all, but instead being very familiar with our inner critic and the negative self-talk that comes along with it. , i think it’s actually a real gift to find ourselves in this position of not knowing because it means we can change that, we can get to know ourselves and our needs, we can start liking ourselves, taking care of ourselves better, and eventually develop a strong and profound sense of self-love. and from my personal and professional experience, i can tell you, this feeling is magical, what’s self-love, anyway .

Think about how we interact with our best friends. We support them, we feel compassion when they suffer, we accept them as they are. Self-love is about striving to treat yourself like your best friend. It’s a feeling of self-appreciation, self-kindness, and self-acceptance that grows over time as a result of continuous nurturing actions that support our resilience, wellbeing, and growth.

Self-love begins with action.  just starting with small acts of self love, as well as noticing and tending to our needs, consistently showing up for ourselves, choosing ourselves one day at a time-all of these create a space for self-love to develop, grow, and flourish., but most people struggle with self-love. if you are one of them- i highly recommend you check out the  self love wheel , the self love wheel.

The  Self Love Wheel  is a revolutionary six-dimensional framework, expertly designed to guide you towards self-empowerment, fulfillment, happiness, and true self love. If you, like most people, struggle with self-love, the  Self Love Wheel  will became your roadmap on how to love yourself more, finally turning the abstract concept of self love into a tangible reality.

Within the  self-love wheel , you will find six dimensions: self-care, self-worth, self-compassion, self-discovery, self-esteem, and self-growth. each of the dimensions is an essential pillar of self love, together offering 86 practical and life-changing strategies to building loving relationship with yourself. , if you’d  like to learn more and to implement this life-changing tool in your personal life, i highly recommend you checkout the ultimate self love starker kit. (take advantage of our 87% off   blowout sale today)., the ultimate self love starter kit .

The  Ultimate Self-Love Toolkit  is a meticulously crafted self-love collection designed to guide you through a transformative journey. It’s a step-by-step roadmap that empowers you to break free from the chains of self-loathing and embrace the power of  true self-love  in every aspect of your life. 

Each component of the  ultimate starter kit: the self-love wheel starter guide, the self-love wheel journal, the self-love wheel workbook, and the self-love wheel affirmation cards, engages all six key pillars of self-love from a different perspective, providing a multi-dimensional approach to finally experiencing true self-love., it is not magic or theory. it’s a very practical evidence-based approach to breaking barriers to  true self-love , de-mystifying the process, becoming very self-aware, and utilizing a transformative and strategic set of tools, rooted in positive psychology, that challenges old limiting beliefs and provides a structured pathway to embracing new patterns of thinking and living that guide, support, and celebrate you at every step of  your self-love journey.  , if you are ready to reclaim your self-worth , embrace your potential, chase your dreams, and lead a life filled with thriving wellbeing, confidence and peace, to replace self-doubt with self-empowerment, comparison with self-acceptance, and self-loathing with true self-love. the ultimate self-love starter kit can show you how, step by step., and today it is on amazing blowout sale at 87% off so you can get started right away, no matter what your budget is. you deserve a life abundant with self-love, joy, inner peace, and happiness. don’t miss this opportunity start today, “100 things i love about myself” list .

One of the best exercises to start nurturing self love is the “100 Things I Love About Myself” list. As I said before, naming 5 things is very often difficult for people, and writing 100 will definitely take a lot of effort and time. But as you work on it, you will start feeling the budding presence of self-love, appreciation, and self-knowledge which with time and practice will become part of our everyday life.

I encourage you to name at least 5 things you love/like/appreciate about yourself today. below you’ll my “100 things i love about myself” list. please use it as a baseline or a source of inspiration for your own list. remember, self-love is a journey, not a destination, my “100 things i love about myself” list, i love that i am not afraid to take risks., i am adventurous., i am a loving and supportive partner., i am a resilient survivor., i respect and love diversity of any kind, which makes me open-minded and accepting., i am strongly, profoundly committed to my recovery from trauma and everything else i struggle with., i am committed to personal improvement and growth., i am not afraid to be honest with myself and others., i have guts., i have strong drive and passion to make this world a better place., i love my eyes, my hair, my breasts, my butt, my thighs, my legs, my feet., i recognize and cherish my strengths., i’m a great swimmer and love water., i am authentic., i am funny., i am a loyal and trustworthy friend., i am very curious and interested., i enjoy bonding and connecting with people., i am a loving mother to my feline babies., i take steps towards achieving my goals and dreams., i love learning new things., i always find solutions to problems that arise., i am not helpless and can take care of myself., i never stop seeking knowledge., i’m very spiritual., i have a great connection with the universe., i’m compassionate towards myself and others., i’m always kind to strangers., i’m the biggest cheerleader for my friends and family., i finish my projects and follow through., i am committed to my mental and physical health., i’m not too proud or afraid to ask for help when i need it., i go to therapy regularly as it’s a huge part of my self-care plan., i have a sustainable self-care plan and i actually use it on regular basis., mental and psychical health and wellbeing are very important to me., i’m committed to feeling and living my best., i completed a lot of formal and informal education., i traveled the world by myself and enjoyed every second of it., i overcame a lot of hardships and trauma, but decided to not let it ruin my life and got help., when i set a goal, i usually follow through with it., i have a sense of great accomplishment from the work i do., i feel like i know what my life purpose is and i actually engage in my life purpose on regular basis., i go to great lengths to accomplish my dreams., i don’t let fear stop me., i’m often fearful, but do whatever it is i fear anyway., i am very entertaining., i was told that i inspire others to take positive change., i love getting older and wiser., i love being silly., i’m always myself, regardless of the crowd around me., i have strong boundaries., i never compromise my values for another person or situation., i almost never do what i don’t want to do., i like myself., i love spending time with myself, i’m a good company:)., i am super creative., i have tons of ideas for new projects at all times., i actually believe that my projects will work out., i understand that sometimes things won’t work out and okay with it., i’m a good judge of character., i really love and respect people in my life., people in my life really love and respect me., i surround myself with people who are loving and supportive., i’m emotionally intelligent., when i’m tough on myself, i notice it and try to be kind instead., i know that perfectionism is a hard way to live and work to be kind and accepting instead., i know my flaws and things that i want to do better, and practice doing better every day., sometimes i take myself to the beach in the middle of the workweek to self-care., i know i’m worthy of love and kindness, just like everyone else., i show myself love and kindness when i’m able., i know that buying things won’t make me feel better., i know that growing and helping others will., i’m committed to living my best life, authentically, and true to myself., i love being active., i have dreams., i have a vision for my life., i’m actually doing something every day to take a step closer to my dreams daily., i love my family and have strong boundaries with them all at the same time., i don’t betray myself and stick to my values and goals., i pursue a better life for me and my family., i don’t believe in impossible., i see miracles and beauty in everyday things., i love to dance., i lived in several countries and learned a lot about different cultures., i know that life is very precious and short, and i get to live it one day at a time., i have a very interesting life because i take risks and pursue my goals and dreams., i’m committed to my values and beliefs., i know that taking brave action will get me where i want/need to go., i have many experiences setting and achieving my goals and dreams., i love helping people., i love creating social change., i’m good at being the 1 st one to do things., i know that i’ve made and making a positive impact on the world., i know that life is sometimes very hard but tomorrow is always a better day., i always have a vacation idea up my sleeve., i really know how to relax., writing 100 things i love about myself is not hard anymore., i’m very grateful for being alive., i’m very grateful to be in recovery., i’m very grateful to be me., what's next, if you are ready to replace self-doubt with self-empowerment, comparison with self-acceptance, and self-loathing with true self-love, then take this time for yourself, and check out the  ultimate self love start kit . you deserve a life abundant with self-love, joy, inner peace, and happiness. , this is your invitation to experience the life-changing  power of true self love the  ultimate self love starter kit  will show you how, step by step , about the author, olga phoenix, mpa, ma is a globally recognized self-love, self-care, and wellbeing expert, speaker, and best-selling author, featured widely in media outlets such as women’s health, thrive global, authority magazine, popsugar, and positive psychology. , olga is the ceo of olga phoenix international, and for the past 16 years, her books, keynotes, workshops, and courses  have been empowering and inspiring thousands of women all over the world to rewrite their stories, discover happiness, purpose, and inner peace through a life-changing power of true self-love . , more to explore.

Your Lifehack to Organizational Self-Care!

Single most important factor that negatively impacts health and wellbeing in organizational contexts is the organization itself: how does the agency works, how leadership relates

Thriving YOU: Building Emotional Resilience in Difficult Times

Dearest WonderPeople! Lately I’ve been getting a lot of questions about self-care and building emotional resilience in these turbulent times. Here are some of my thoughts

Olga Phoenix is an internationally recognized self care, self love, and wellbeing expert, speaker, and best-selling author. Her keynotes, courses, licensing programs, and books empower and inspire individuals and organizations to grow and flourish.

Learning to Love Yourself

By Jaclyn Durnil, MSW – Dec. 3, 2019

“If you can learn to love yourself and all the flaws, you can love other people so much better. And that makes you so happy.” – Kristen Chenowith

Why is it so difficult to love ourselves? Basically, the short answer to this question is that we were raised in a society that didn’t teach us about self-love. This may not seem very important to some, but self-love is one of the best things you can do for yourself.

Loving yourself provides you with self-confidence, self-worth, and in general, you feel more positive. If you can learn to love yourself, you will feel happier and will learn to take better care of yourself.

Looking in the mirror, most of us see a lot of different flaws and remember too many past experiences and failings to love ourselves. The less you love yourself, listen to yourself, and understand yourself, the more confused, upset, and frustrated you will be in life. When you begin to love yourself and continue to love yourself more and more each day, things slowly will be a little bit better in every way possible.

Unfortunately, self-love isn’t always easy. 

Accepting the pain and allowing yourself to be honest with who you are is a big step to loving yourself. Forgive yourself for past actions and things you are ashamed of doing.

Carrying a lot of negative emotions like jealousy, disgust, and rage can have a negative impact. We need to learn how to accept not only the emotions that create love, joy, and happiness but also the ones that cause fear, insecurity, and anger in our lives.

While we need to learn how to acknowledge and accept the pain with the love, another step is reconciling with a cold and unopened heart. Asking yourself if you fully love yourself can be very difficult because you must accept your flaws and faults.

Love is something we choose, the same way we choose anger, hate, or sadness. We have the power to forgive someone who has hurt us in the past. We can learn to finally heal from something when we can forgive. We can always choose love.

Learning to love yourself leads to better self-care. Examples of this could be taking a break from time to time and accepting that no one is perfect and things happen.

Another example could be saying no to others when you really don’t have the time or energy to say yes. We often do too much for other people because we want to please everyone. We can forget to look after ourselves and then we become overwhelmed.

Today is the day you can love yourself completely with no expectations. Making the choice right now to choose your own love is the most powerful healing force you have.

You might also like

Support Youth First

Help protect and heal the hearts of children by supporting Youth First!

Where to find us

111 SE Third Street, Suite 405 Evansville, IN 47708

Mon–Fri: 8:00–5:00 Sat–Sun: Closed

Get In Touch

812-421-8336