compare and contrast essay about mother and daughter

• TOP CATEGORIES
• AS and A Level
• University Degree
• International Baccalaureate
• Uncategorised
• 5 Star Essays
• Study Tools
• Study Guides
• Meet the Team
• English Literature
• Prose Fiction
• Miscellaneous

Compare and contrast the mother-daughter relationship in 'A Taste Of Honey' by Shelagh Delaney and 'A Mother's Fondness' by Marion Rachel Stewart.

Drama – Comparative Study post 1900                                                        Coursework

Title:   Compare and contrast the mother-daughter relationship in ‘A Taste Of Honey’ by Shelagh Delaney and ‘A Mother’s Fondness’ by Marion Rachel Stewart.

No relationship is quite as primal as the one between a mother and her daughter. Mother-daughter relationships in general are characterised by a unique bond; formed and developed from conception. As a young child your mother is an angel. You cover your face with her lipstick and model her high heels wanting to be just like her. This continues to be the case until you’re about thirteen-experiencing all sorts of changes in your life. Suddenly you feel your mother becomes ignorant of your feelings, abrasive and protective of you. For the next 5 years or so you’re prime form of communication will be through the word “ Moooooommmmmmm!” Then, during your twenties/thirties ‘Mommy’ becomes a daughter’s best friend again. However, this is not always the case and though many mother-daughter relationships are the similar, they all differ in some way. I will be analysing ‘A Taste of Honey’ and ‘A Mother’s Fondness’ in order to determine these similar and contrasting aspects.

 ‘A Mother’s Fondness’ by Marion Rachel Stewart is a contemporary short story involving a mother and her daughter, Cathie. The issues in their relationship are highlighted when Cathie makes her way home much later than her mother expected. The text is divided into two sections: ‘The Mother’ and ‘The Daughter’. Each section reveals their contrasting views and feelings about the situation, and the present nature of their relationship.

‘A Taste Of Honey’ by Shelagh Delaney is set in the 1950’s. A time when Britain was recovering from the shortages and rationing that were the aftermath of the war, and when issues such as homophobia and racism were at an all time high. This theatre production shows how single parent Helen copes with living in a small flat in a poor area in Manchester, alongside her teenaged daughter Jo.

After reading each text, it was evident that the mothers are very different; therefore approaching motherhood dissimilarly. Helen likes to enjoy life, doing things her own way, even at the expense of her daughter’s happiness. She comes across in the play as a careless woman; never able to locate her hat or shoes, and doesn’t think. Her daughter rightly says “You never think. That’s your trouble”  (Pg43). At one point in the play, Jo explained that she was not sulking but thinking. Helen replied, “Well, don’t think. It doesn’t do you any good”  (Pg44). This strong opinion explains her mismanagement of her own life and relationship with her daughter. In “A Mother’s Fondness” however, the Mother is more than willing and able to think logically about how to locate and ensure her daughters safety. Her level of thought upon the matter is so intense that she begins to experience physical, emotional and mental signs of anxiety, due to worry of Cathie’s whereabouts.

         “…I felt hungry but could not eat, tired but could not sleep, tormented by my imagination. ” She also “…started to cry…”  and described:   “It was hard to speak as the cries of pain echoed through my head.”

This is a preview of the whole essay

Another difference is the fact that each mother and daughter hurt each other in different ways. It is the mother’s unconditional love for her daughter in ‘A Mother’s Fondness’ that eventually jeopardises their relationship. As shown in the previous paragraph, Cathie’s mother cares considerably for her; it is this care and love that silences her anger in a desperate bid not to hurt Cathie- a bid that failed miserably.

“…I wanted to be angry, I wanted to show how worried I had been…It seemed as though she hated me and wanted to hurt me…”

This quote from ‘The Mother’ demonstrates the fact that the mother is hurting, not knowing exactly how her daughter feels due to her decision to remain silent likewise.

“There had been so much fuss and now she was acting as if nothing happened…I didn’t see any point in talking…I kept very quiet and pretended I wasn’t bothered.” (‘The Daughter’)

 The fact that Cathie also fails to express her inner feelings leaves them interpreting each other’s actions poorly. Consequently, both mother and daughter are left hurting each other through their silence. Unlike Cathie and her mother, Jo and Helen hurt each other through their inability to remain quiet. It is paradoxical that it has become an abnormal normality for Helen to hurl wounding verbal abuse at her daughter without thought. During a heated argument Helen told her daughter that she was an un-wanted baby.

“I should have got rid of you before you were born.”(Pg 62)

As mentioned before and admitted by Helen herself, she doesn’t like to think. This is just one example of how Helen disregards her daughter.

more Helen rudeness. How this affects Jo.

More Jo rudeness showing she also has no respect.

Shown by Helen’s sheer lack of thought for her daughter Jo, she has no consideration for her feelings. She continually ensures the suppression of her daughter and at one stage has the audacity to express this on a confrontational level.

“…I have to consider something far more important than your feelings.”(Pg 1)

This is further confirmation of Helen’s severe disrespect and heartlessness towards her daughter. An attitude which stemmed from her initial rejection to motherhood and forthcoming child. She blames Jo for her divorce-her birth being the event that revealed Helen’s unfaithfulness to the husband she described as a retard. In my judgement, she has not learnt to handle her problems and take full responsibility for her ‘immoral doings’. This has proven very costly in both her and her daughter’s lives.

Cathie’s mother’s consideration for her can be described as the other end of the extreme. Her calm, quiet approach to the situation reveals how valuable she sees their relationship; enough not to be damaged in a way that Helen made possible.  

The fact that Helen doesn’t know much about her daughter and Cathie’s mother feels she knows her daughter is of significance in their relationship. Helen’s reaction to Jo’s personal drawings was one of shock, yet pleasant surprise.

“ I didn’t realise I had such a talented daughter.”

This demonstrates not only the fact that she hasn’t spent quality time learning and bonding with her daughter, but the sad reality that Helen hasn’t desired to. Prior to the above quote, Helen implied that she expected her daughter to tell her everything about herself – she has a right to know.

“I thought you said you weren’t good at anything”

Here, we see that Helen has just taken Jo’s word for the matter; she has simply accepted it and not bothered to know otherwise.

The fact that some daughters are able to talk to their mothers about boyfriends/relationships shows the closer friendship a mother and daughter can share. Helen didn’t know whether or not Jo ad a boyfriend, and this mirrors the lack of confidence Jo has in Helen as a Mother, let alone a friend. Helen doesn’t seem to possess ‘A Mother’s Fondness’ – the built-in, unconditional, love and interest a Mother has in the welfare of their child.

        On the other hand, Cathie’s mother feels that she knows her child all too well. She is confident that her daughter wouldn’t understand her if she showed she was angry:

“ I knew that she would not see my anger, as love for her”

The Mother’s maternal instincts lead her to believe something was not right when her daughter didn’t arrive home on time. This shows that Cathie is respectful of her Mother’s wishes to be home on time. Her mother is familiar with her character and feels she knows her. She says:

        “…she would have poured to tell me if she was going away anywhere.”

When each Mother-daughter relationship begins to encounter difficulty, the Mother’s react differently. Cathie’s Mum blames herself for her daughter’s behaviour. She is fully aware of her parental responsibilities/duties. She knows that her actions have a deep impact on her daughter and their relationship status.

“I had failed…it was my fault she was as she was. I had brought myself pain.”

The Mother distinguishes the problem and wants to make amends to their estranged relationship. She does her best to prevent yet another hurtful row and keeps silent; praying it won’t happen again.

        Helen however, (as mentioned previously) doesn’t spare a single thought for her daughter’s feelings. She quite willingly expresses her thoughts and emotions in a rude and obnoxious manner and openly declares that she is not responsible for her daughter or their situation.

        “Have I ever laid claim to being a proper mother.”

This quote shows that she is not hypocritical about herself, which in a way is a good thing. However, there is nothing positive about Helen’s approach to motherhood. Unlike Cathie’s Mother who blames herself, Helen points her finger at Jo:

“It’s your fault…”

In act__scene__, Helen attempts to justify her reasons for neglecting Jo.

“QUOTE”

The way in which the daughters are portrayed in the text differ in that so much sympathy is evoked in the audience for Jo. She has had to live her life and grow up without a true Mother. She has not had someone to look up to, someone to show her love and be a backbone, especially during the time of adolescence. The atmosphere at the flat is one of hopelessness, tension and distress, which is why we feek sirr for her. SETTING ON STAGE

In ‘A Mother’s Fondness’ we sympathise with the Mother as she cares so much for her daughter who feels as if she doesn’t.

Despite the many differences in each mother-daughter relationship, there are also many similarities. One of which is the way both daughters use some form of escapism to avoid facing up to their problems. When Cathie learned that her mum had been everywhere looking for her, she asked her friend Elaine if she could stay and not return home. She had missed two busses and expected that her mum would be very upset with her.

“She would be furious…This meant another row.

Elaine, I don’t want to go home. Can’t I stay here?”

It is evident from this quote that Cathie would rather remain with her friend, away from home and the prospect of another argument with her mother. This teaches the audience that the disagreements she had with her mother were emotionally very damaging – she couldn’t bear another instance wherein she and her mother were on bad terms.

Unlike Cathie, Jo recites nursery rhymes for fun with Geoff. This can be read into and analysed in a psychological sense: the nursery rhymes bring her laughter, which aids in transporting her to the childhood she never enjoyed.

“ You look like a spratt. Jack Spratt, who’d eat no fat, his wife would eat no lean and so between then both, you see, they licked the platter clean. Did u enjoy that dramatic recitation?” (pg51)

Her question at the end prompts a positive response from Geoff who doesn’t want to deflate her cheerful mood. She encourages that he joins in, wanting someone to play with as it were.

“You say one”  – We can imagine that this was said with a happy expectant look upon her face. Geoff then proceeds to recite another rhyme and upon completion, she expresses how much she enjoyed it:

“I like that. Do you know any more?”

  Jo is keen that this playful, childlike interaction between them continues. She gets much more out of it than would any other average person. The fun factor and distraction nursery rhymes brought about were doing her good – she was not dwelling upon thoughts of her broken family.

        Both Jo and Cathie feel as though they are not receiving enough care and attention – they want to feel loved. This is another similarity found in each relationship. During the car journey Cathie and her mother made home, they remained silent (as previously highlighted). Though most other teens resent the fact that in the same situation, their mum’s would talk endlessly about how worried they were and so on, Cathie would rather that was the case.

“ I was angry…she was acting as if nothing had happened…She simply didn’t care about me…”

In any relationship, it is important that there is balance between certain factors. Cathie and her mum are at one end of the extreme maintaining their silence - no fuss. This is the absolute opposite to Jo and Helen who are at the other end of the extreme.

In Jo’s case, she threatens to jump out of the window in order to determine whether or not Helen cares about her. She wants to hear someone does actually care for her. Her desperation and longing for love is made evident in her dramatic actions. Jo is aware that the concept of actions speaking louder than words is never going to be a reality for her. Therefore she resorts to grabbing any ounce of ‘love’ Helen had to offer her – even it was mere words. This attention seeking is to be expected from Jo, as Helen never really gave Jo a mother’s love.

        We can be certain that a lack of communication is common within each relationship. We’ve seen how Cathie’s mother found it difficult to express her upset to her daughter and visa versa. We also know that the effects of this were negative: Cathie felt that her mother didn’t care for her, and her mother felt that Cathie hated her. The two of them are alike in that they pretend that everything is ok between them when there are clearly important issues to be tackled and discussed. It is important that each mother and daughter feel they can talk to each other on a mature and serious level. At times, we see Jo making attempts to do so. However, Helen does not respond to this very well and is constantly changing the subject showing her inability to listen to her daughter.

Document Details

• Word Count 2422
• Page Count 4
• Subject English

Related Essays

Compare and Contrast "The Canterville Ghost" by Oscar Wilde and "Company" b...

Explore the relationship between Mariam and Laila in A Thousand Splendid Su...

Compare and contrast the plays George by C G Bond and A Cream Cracker Under...

Compare and Contrast the Authors' Presentation of the Relationship between...

Why Are Mother-Daughter Relationships So Complex?

Mother-daughter relationships are known for being fraught with complications, therapist holli rubin , who offers specialist mother-daughter 'couples' therapy, explores why this is.

Oh you can still remember those words and that feeling.... it’s a girl!!! A girl, how lucky! How exciting, how special, how important, how hopeful! We will be so close! Best friends! Tell each other things, secrets, share hopes, dreams, fears in a way that only mother and daughter could really do....

But we don’t think of the other side of this relationship .... how complicated, challenging and sometimes downright impossible it can be.

Mother-daughter relationships are complex – eliciting a special set of emotions reserved only for the mother-daughter couple. Even the healthiest of relationships can be at times fraught with real challenges.

So, what goes into making a ‘healthy’ mother-daughter relationship when your daughter grows up?

A ‘healthy’ mother-daughter relationship is one that allows for closeness and togetherness – but simultaneously – for independence and space. It’s caring and loving and fun and silly. This changes at every age and stage from childhood to adulthood. A mother daughter relationship is whatever you choose to make it!

A good place to start is by establishing boundaries for the relationship.

What does that mean?

Making sure both mother and daughter feel safe, comfortable and satisfied within the relationship.

Guilt is a useless emotion

Guilt is an emotion that often exists in close and complicated familial relationships. It is a difficult and strong emotion that, when understood better, appears to serve very little purpose. It can sometimes be used to convince people to do or feel or act in ways they themselves do not want to and it is not a healthy tool in any relationship, no matter what the dynamic may be.

When it comes to mothers and daughters, guilt can manifest itself when one, or both, are overly critical of the other.

When one feels hurt, they may need to bring up past events that are known to make the other feel upset and guilty. This is done to express unresolved hurt – perhaps in an unconscious way – perhaps more directly. Either way, it is not a good or healthy tactic and will only strain the current relationship.

Mothers and daughters can become trapped in this type of relationship struggle. The most effective way to get past the hurt is to be able to talk about it from both sides – with an aim to forgive each other and move on from the past – in order to establish a healthier relationship.

Once forgiven, you must move on and try not to bring back old issues from your conversations. Be open to having difficult conversations with an aim towards forgiveness.

Be yourself 

In healthy mother-daughter relationships, both parties need to take the other for who they are, and not engage with trying to change them.

The most common form of this is when the mother would like her daughter to be more like her. This may be in personality, values, choices, opinions. The mother may try to make the daughter feel guilty for being different and may consistently try to change her. This can lead the daughter to feel that they are often disappointing their mother and often trying to please without success. This can lead to arguments, resentment and overall an unhealthy relationship.

Being in the company of someone that’s trying to change you isn’t fun!

The key to this is acceptance. The mother needs to accept the perceived differences or faults and focus on the daughter’s positive attributes and not those that are perceived as negative.

Be open to conflict 

There will always be conflict in the world and conflict in relationships. That is normal. Conflict isn’t something that can be ignored. If conflict is ignored, then there will always be tension and unresolved issues.

The first step is to identify the conflict and the reasons for it. Take some time out to do this.

Once you’ve identified the conflict, you need to talk about it.

It is best for both to engage in a conversation around this conflict – regardless of how difficult it might be to begin. Trying to do so in a positive and respectful way will help keep both sides engaged and not exacerbate the situation further:

• Allow both sides to present their side of the argument without interruption. It’s important that each person has their say and that the other party listens.
• Try not to bring up unrelated negative events. Try to think of positive experiences that you would like to build on rather than focusing on the negative.
• Try to end on a positive and agree on ways that you can move forward. Tell each other how much you love each other and what you like about each other.

You may need to accept that this may take time but keep revisiting regularly and don’t avoid having the conversation again if it’s needed.

You may have to agree to disagree. This can be acceptable so long as it’s not constantly used as a guilt tool and both parties genuinely accept the differences.

Spending time together

Some mothers and daughters enjoy spending a lot of time together, some don’t. One may want more time and one may want less. The party wanting more may make the other feel guilty for not wanting to spend a lot of time together.

The ideal situation is that time together should be happy, positive and uplifting. If spending less time together achieves that, then overall the relationship will be healthier. Just because you’re related doesn’t mean that you need to spend all your time together.

The key is to be mindful of your behaviour towards each other and notice how time together impacts on your mood.

Don’t feel guilty about reducing the amount of time together if it makes the relationship work better.

Allow each other to make mistakes 

It can be hard for a mother to stand back and let the daughter make, what they perceive as, mistakes. Only when you’re a mother can you really understand how hard it is.

In childhood it is important to guide, lead and mentor your daughter as they have no foundations to work on. They need to be guided and protected. But part of becoming a grown up is needing to learn to navigate life’s challenges independently. The mother must step back to allow her daughter to develop her independence and most importantly, allow her to make her own mistakes. As humans, we only learn from mistakes that we make.

Learning to strike a balance between offering helpful guidance, and intervening at every struggle, is the challenge. But getting that balance to establish the perfect recipe for a happy and healthy mother daughter relationship is the goal!

Holli Rubin is a verified welldoing.org therapist in SW London

Further reading

Lady bird: my mother my self revisited, i'm a mother, but mother's day isn't for me, maternal isolation: it takes a village to support a mother, the dilemma of the difficult mother, find welldoing therapists near you, related articles, recent posts.

Dear Therapist..."I Don't Know How to Stick Up For Myself"

Therapy Horror Stories: Can You Trust Your Therapist?

8 Steps to Upgrade Your Brain Health

What Are Your Blind Spots?

Meet the Therapist: Mary Ablett

Book of the Month: Broken Threads by Mishal Husain

Meet the Winners of the Welldoing Inspiration Awards 2024

The Impact of Growing Up with a Narcissistic Parent

Dear Therapist..."I'm Full of Resentment"

5 Things I Learnt from a Mental Health Crisis as a Medical Student

Find counsellors and therapists in London

Find counsellors and therapists in your region, join over 23,000 others on our newsletter.

The Joy Luck Club

Ask litcharts ai: the answer to your questions.

The main focus in The Joy Luck Club is the complex relationship between mothers and daughters, and the inherent bond that’s always between them despite generational and cultural conflicts. The novel follows June Woo ’s search to understand her deceased mother Suyuan ’s life, supplemented by stories from her mother’s three best friends, Lindo , An-mei , and Ying-ying . June’s memory of her mother is complicated by the revelation that Suyuan had twin baby girls during World War II, but had to leave them in China for their own safety during the Japanese invasion. June questions whether she ever truly knew her mother, but the three older women insist that Suyuan exists deep in June’s bones. The novel, in fact, suggests that the connection between mother and daughter exists beyond the knowledge of personal events; it’s steeped in inherited behaviors and selflessness over the course of a lifetime. An-mei tells a related story about her banished mother returning home to care for An-mei’s dying grandmother, Popo ; her mother goes so far as to cut out a piece of her arm to prepare special medicine. The physical sacrifice represents the lengths that some daughters go to honor their mothers.

In contrast, the daughters of the Joy Luck Club members share stories about the difficulties of growing up with immigrant mothers. Cultural values clash as the American-born daughters want freedom from their mothers’ old-fashioned beliefs. Yet by the end, the daughters discover their overbearing mothers have always had their best interests at heart. Ying-ying’s daughter Lena tries to hide her impending divorce, but her mother wants to help her rediscover the “tiger side” of her Chinese identity, which fights and does not yield to sadness. Though initially ashamed to reveal such a failure to her mother, Lena realizes her mother fundamentally understands her decisions, as they share similar personal histories and values. As the standalone stories weave together in The Joy Luck Club , they expose how boundless maternal love can be, even when daughters misunderstand or undervalue it. As June meets her half-sisters for the first time in China, she feels her mother’s presence with them, dispelling any doubt about understanding her mother’s lifelong intentions. Though she cannot know every detail of her mother’s history, June preserves the lessons that Suyuan taught her as a child, and the deep love for family to share with her new half-sisters.

Mother-Daughter Relationships ThemeTracker

Mother-Daughter Relationships Quotes in The Joy Luck Club

In America I will have a daughter just like me. But over there nobody will say her worth is measured by the loudness of her husband’s belch. Over there nobody will look down on her, because I will make her speak only perfect American English.

“This feather may look worthless, but it comes from afar and carries with it all my good intentions." And she waited, year after year, for the day she could tell her daughter this in perfect American English.

I’m shaking, trying to hold something inside. The last time I saw them, at the funeral, I had broken down and cried big gulping sobs. They must wonder how someone like me can take my mother’s place. A friend once told me that my mother and I were alike, that we had the same wispy hand gestures, the same girlish laugh and sideways look. When I shyly told my mother this, she seemed insulted and said, "You don’t even know little percent of me! How can you be me?" And she’s right. How can I be my mother at Joy Luck?

Not know your own mother? How can you say? Your mother is in your bones!

My mother took her flesh and put it in the soup. She cooked magic in the ancient tradition to try to cure her mother this one last time. She opened Popo’s mouth, already too tight from trying to keep her spirit in. She fed her this soup, but that night Popo flew away with her illness. Even though I was young, I could see the pain of the flesh and the worth of the pain.

I once sacrificed my life to keep my parents’ promise. This means nothing to you, because to you promises mean nothing. A daughter can promise to come to dinner, but if she has a headache, if she has a traffic jam, if she wants to watch a favorite movie on TV, she no longer has a promise.

I had no choice, now or later. That was how backward families in the country were. We were always the last to give up stupid old-fashioned customs. In other cities already, a man could choose his own wife, with his parents’ permission of course. But we were cut off from this new type of thought. You never heard if ideas were better in another city, only if they were worse.

All these years I kept my true nature hidden, running along like a small shadow so nobody could catch me. And because I moved so secretly now my daughter does not see me. She sees a list of things to buy, her checkbook out of balance, her ashtray sitting crooked on a straight table. And I want to tell her this: we are lost, she and I, unseen and not seeing, unheard and not hearing, unknown by others

"I don’t believe you. Let me see the book." "It is written in Chinese. You cannot understand it. That is why you must listen to me."

“You can’t tell me because you don’t know! You don’t know anything!” And the girl ran outside, jumped on her bicycle, and in her hurry to get away, she fell before she even reached the corner.

I was six when my mother taught me the art of invisible strength. It was a strategy for winning arguments, respect from others, and eventually, though neither of us knew it at the time, chess games.

I saw what seemed to be the prodigy side of me – because I had never seen that face before. I looked at my reflection, blinking so I could see more clearly. The girl staring back at me was angry, powerful. This girl and I were the same. I had new thoughts, willful thoughts, or rather thoughts filled with lots of won’ts. I won’t let her change me, I promised to myself. I won’t be what I’m not.

“You want me to be someone that I’m not!” I sobbed. “I’ll never be the kind of daughter you want me to be… I wish I wasn’t your daughter. I wish you weren’t my mother,” I shouted. As I said these things I got scared. It felt… as if this awful side of me had surfaced at last... And that’s when I remembered the babies she had lost in China, the ones we never talked about. “I wish I’d never been born!” I shouted. “I wish I were dead! Like them.” It was as if I had said the magic words Alakazam!—and her face went blank.

To this day, I believe my mother has the mysterious ability to see things before they happen. She has a Chinese saying for what she knows. Chunwang chihan : if the lips are gone, the teeth will be cold. Which means, I suppose, one thing is always the result of another.

That’s what she is. A Horse, born in 1918, destined to be obstinate and frank to the point of tactlessness. She and I make a bad combination, because I’m a Rabbit, born in 1951, supposedly sensitive, with tendencies toward being thin-skinned and skittery at the first sign of criticism.

And my mother loved to show me off, like one of the many trophies she polished. She used to discuss my games as if she had devised the strategies… and a hundred other useless things that had nothing to do with my winning.

“A mother is best. A mother knows what is inside you," she said above the singing voices. "A psyche-atricks will only make you hulihudu , make you see heimongmong ."

The minute our train leaves the Hong Kong border and enters Shenzhen, China, I feel different. I can feel the skin on my forehead tingling, my blood rushing through a new course, my bones aching with a familiar old pain. And I think, My mother was right. I am becoming Chinese.

"You don’t understand," I protested. "What I don’t understand?" she said. And then I whispered, "They’ll think I’m responsible, that she died because I didn’t appreciate her." And Auntie Lindo looked satisfied and sad at the same time, as if this were true and I had finally realized it.

I look at their faces again and see no trace of my mother in them. Yet they still look familiar. And now I also see what part of me is Chinese. It is so obvious. It is my family. It is in our blood. After all these years, I can finally be let go.

• Free Essays
• Citation Generator

"Compare and contrast essay on mother and a daughter" Essays and Research Papers

Mothers & Daughters

Mothers and daughters have been written about‚ criticized‚ publicized‚ condemned‚ and praised for a long time. As more and more material becomes available on mother - daughter relationships‚ it becomes apparent that being a mother and being a daughter means different things to different people depending on race‚ economics‚ social status and blood type. This paper will explore the meaning of being a mother and being a daughter by combining all of these independent variables. A definition of motherhood

Premium Family Mother Interpersonal relationship

Compare & Contrast - a Daughter Leaving Home

Compare & Contrast Essay The poem‚ “To a Daughter Leaving Home”‚ by Linda Pastan‚ depicts the scene of a mother teaching her little girl to ride a bike at the age of eight and watching her master it. Yvor Winter’s “At the San Francisco Airport" is about a father reminiscing about the memory of his daughter growing up and leaving him at the airport. Both these poems speak of the much dreaded time in a parent’s life where their daughter’s grow up and leave their homes. Although the poems appear

Free Poetry Rhyme San Francisco International Airport

Compare And Contrast Daughter Of The Sea Hannah

many books in which I have read before but none as interesting as what I am about to share. One of the books is “ Daughter of the Sea‚ Hannah” by Kathryn Lasky. The other one is “The Fallen” by Thomas E. Sniegoski. Let us look at the differences between the two novels in the next paragraph. One of the differences is the thickness of the book and the size of the words. The novel “ Daughter of the Sea‚ Hannah” is obviously for smaller kids around five to ten to

Premium Difference Literature Fiction

Mother Daughter

Dr. Wilson March 4‚2014 Throughout American history illegal immigration has been an extreme focal point in many important discussions. The states with the highest population of illegal immigrants consist of Mexico‚ California‚ Texas‚ and Arizona. These criminal illegal immigrants have caused high crime rates and violence especially in Arizona. “The crimes committed in America by illegal aliens are horrendous‚ but because the American people allow this administration to remain

Premium Illegal drug trade Crime Gang

Mother-Daughter Relationships

The Mother - Daughter Relationship in Amnesty In Nancy Chodorow’s Pre-oedipal gender configurations‚ she emphasizes the importance of the mother and society in a child’s development. In contrast to Freud’s emphasis on the father‚ castration anxiety‚ and other masculine concepts‚ Chodorow argues that the mother plays the most significant role in a child’s development. A child’s pre-oedipal relationship with their mother is rich‚ long-lasting‚ and preexists any significant relation to the child’s

Premium Psychoanalysis Human

Mother Daughter Bond

There are no simple or perfect relationships between mothers and daughters . Relationships are a delicate balance between the love and emotions of two individuals. They are ever changing and evolving‚ and are each unique as the people in them. Amy Tan’s novels offer an inside glimpse into several intricate mother daughter relationships. Her characters suffer hardships as well as times of joy. There are many similarities in the mother and daughter relationships in the books by Amy Tan. One of the most

Premium Family Mother Mothers

Mother And Daughter By Yollie

Character Essay After reading the story “ Mother and Daughter ” I have noticed some character traits about the main character Yollie. Yollie is a very interesting character. Her personality in the book makes the book just that much better. In relation‚ three characteristics that Yollie demonstrates in this story very well is that she is very intelligent‚ humorous and appreciative. In this story‚ one of the first characteristics that Yollie demonstrates is intelligence. Intelligence means

Premium English-language films Fiction Family

A Mother Daughter Relationship

Lynn V. Santisteban Professor Thacker English 255 21 March 2014 A Mother Daughter Relationship Most parents expect many things from their children but most importantly wish their children to be successful and happy‚ but parents hold different expectations based on their child’s gender. The expectations that both mothers have are common because both of them have daughters . These differences in expectations of gender can be seen in literature such as Girl by Jamaica Kincaid where she will list everything

Premium Gender role

Mother Daughter communication

my research I did mother - daughter communication because my mom and I don’t have that great of communication so I wanted to find out more about it. In this research they did a study on the content and structure of mother - daughter conflict interactions during early adolescence. I’m obviously not in my adolescence stage still but this still explains the problems and solutions in general. The aim of this study is to examine conflict management behaviors of daughters and their mothers in conflict interactions

Premium Psychology Conflict Mother

Poems: Mother and Daughter

What is motherhood? Being caring and having patience are the main two components that make a good mother . In the poems “Daystar by Rita Dove and “To a Daughter Leaving Home” by Linda Pastan both of the mothers are going through different stages of motherhood. In both poems we see the similarities that both poems have and we also see the differences. Dove and Pastan show us an early stage of mother and a late stage of motherhood. Although they are different stages of motherhood‚ they are both tough

Premium Mother Family Wife

• Conflict management
• Debut albums
• Drug cartel
• English-language films
• Gender role
• Human behavior
• Compare and contrast essay on music then and now
• Compare and contrast essay on nicholas sparks books
• Compare and contrast essay on obesity
• Compare and contrast essay on online school vs traditional school
• Compare and contrast essay on presidential and parliamentary systems
• Compare and contrast essay on rainsford and zaroff
• Compare and contrast essay on registered nurse
• Compare and contrast essay on romeo and juliet and west side story
• Compare and contrast essay on short story the sniper and cranes
• Compare and contrast essay on smokers and non smokers

Mother-Daughter Relationships in “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan Essay

• To find inspiration for your paper and overcome writer’s block
• As a source of information (ensure proper referencing)
• As a template for you assignment

Amy Tan is a famous American writer who was born in 1952. She is well-known for her novellas about the conflict between mothers and daughters and the difficulties of the Chinese-American experience. Amy Tan’s first book is The Joy Luck Club (1989). It consists of sixteen novellas, which are united by the same characters and by the generational conflict, but also can stand alone themselves (Nagel 277). One of the short stories of this book is called “Two Kinds” , and this very novella will be analyzed in this essay. The purpose of this paper is to provide a summary of “Two Kinds”, and to discuss the causes of differences between mothers and daughters and the moment of the conflict resolution.

First of all, it is important to give a summary of the “Two Kinds”. This novella tells a story about complicated relationships between a mother and her daughter, Jing-mei. Mrs. Woo moved from China to the USA, and now she truly believes that “you could be anything you wanted to be in America” (Tan 132). She aims to find her daughter’s hidden talents, and, after trying many things, decides to send her to piano lessons. Jing-mei, who is determined to prove to her mother that she has no talents, does not put much effort to learn.

A year later, the girl has to perform in a talent show, where she completely fails. After the performance, she refuses to continue piano lessons and has a huge fight with her mother. Mrs. Woo says that there are “only two kinds of daughters: those who are obedient and those who follow their own mind! Only one kind of daughter can live in this house. Obedient daughter” (Tan 136). The next time Jing-mei plays the piano is many years later when Mrs. Woo dies, and she comes to her mother’s house again.

The great difference in ways of thinking may be attributed to a combination of several reasons. The first reason is the age difference and, accordingly, the lack of life experience the daughter has. Jing-mei knows about her mother’s losses, but she cannot fully understand her since she never went through anything like that. Her mother’s desire to make Jing-mei famous seems meaningless and stupid to the child, so she puts no effort into learning something and much effort to prove Suyuan Woo wrong. As to Mrs. Woo, it is evident that she does not understand her child; she forgot what it means to be a nine-year-old. It seems like the daughter and the mother speak different languages, the language of youth and the one of old age, and do not want to try to understand each other.

The second reason is the cultural differences between Suyuan Woo and Jing-mei. According to Borus, the mother is afraid that her daughter “will not have Chinese character” (42). No matter how hard Mrs. Woo believes in the American Dream, she is still Chinese and wants her daughter to be Chinese too. However, the truth is that Jing-mei was born in the USA, she lives in the USA, and she is far away from the Chinese traditions. While her mother organizes a Chinese club that aims at “the preservation of the generational wisdom of a culture” (Hays 54), her daughter is not very interested in that culture. She finds her only talent, to thwart her mother’s ambitions, and sticks to it for many years.

The third reason for the misunderstanding between the mother and the daughter is personality differences. Undoubtedly, the fact that Mrs. Woo and Jing-mei have different characters is evident. It is believed that “at the core of the struggle is the conflict between Suyuan Woo’s belief in America as the land of the unlimited potential and Jing-mei’s more realistic expectations” (Werlock). Mrs. Woo wants her daughter to become famous and successful; Jing-mei, meanwhile, does not have any ambitions and high hopes for the future.

She is an ordinary girl, “not a genius,” and wants to stay the same (Tan 136). From all of the above, one can say that “Two Kinds” is an examination of Chinese-American mother-daughter relationships. Tan believes that it is hard for Jing-mei to support her mother and follow Chinese traditions as her homeland is America (Tan 138). Moreover, this short story portrays a more universal clash of wills between mothers and daughters. The generational conflict exists in every century and every country. Because of age, cultural and personality differences, many mothers and daughters feel the generation gap between them.

It is hard to disagree that the conflict between mothers and daughters is complicated. The title of the story, “Two Kinds”, “refers to two kinds of daughters – Chinese and American – identifying the two perspectives that create the story’s conflict (Kirszner and Mandell 3).

The resolution of the conflict takes place at the end of the story when Jing-mei is thirty years old. After her mother’s death, Jing-mei takes the piano to her home and starts playing, realizing that she still remembers how to do that. After some moments, it appears to her that the two pieces, the “Pleading Child” and the “Perfectly Contented,” are two parts of the same song (Tan 136). That means that a child may be different – pleading and pleased, obedient and following their mind.

To conclude, one can admit that the conflict between generations is very complicated. Although a mother and a daughter may love and understand each other, there are moments when the generation gap appears in their lives. Parents and children are different as they grow up in different times, societies, and circumstances. As misunderstandings cannot be completely avoided, mothers and daughters need to do their best to listen and to understand each other.

Works Cited

Borus, Audrey. Reading and Interpreting the Works of Amy Tan. Enslow Publishing, 2016.

Hays, Sara. “Playing Games as Cultural Expression: Mah Jong, Chess, and Bourré in the Works of Amy Tan and Tim Gautreaux.” Scientia et Humanitas: A Journal of Student Research , vol. 7, 2017, pp. 53-66.

Kirszner, Laurie G., and Stephen R. Mandell. Portable Literature: Reading, Reacting, Writing . Cengage Learning, 2017.

Nagel, James. The American Short Story Handbook . John Wiley & Sons, 2015.

Tan, Amy. “Two Kinds.” The Joy Luck Club . Random House, 2008, pp. 132-144.

Werlock, Abby H. P. Encyclopedia of the American Short Story . Infobase Learning, 2015.

• "The Joy Luck Club": Film Analysis
• Moving to a Foreign Country: Two Kinds by Amy Tan
• Stories "Girl" by Kincaid vs. "Everyday Use" by Walker
• Characters of "Monstress" and "Ms. Marvel" Comics
• Struggle and Oppression of an African-American Woman in Ann Petry’s Novel “The Street“
• “Into the Wild” the Book by Jon Krakauer
• "Hollywood Cinema" the Book by Richard Maltby
• “Click, Clack, Moo: Cows That Type” the Book by Cronin Doreen
• Chicago (A-D)
• Chicago (N-B)

IvyPanda. (2021, June 28). Mother-Daughter Relationships in “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan. https://ivypanda.com/essays/mother-daughter-relationships-in-two-kinds-by-amy-tan/

"Mother-Daughter Relationships in “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan." IvyPanda , 28 June 2021, ivypanda.com/essays/mother-daughter-relationships-in-two-kinds-by-amy-tan/.

IvyPanda . (2021) 'Mother-Daughter Relationships in “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan'. 28 June.

IvyPanda . 2021. "Mother-Daughter Relationships in “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan." June 28, 2021. https://ivypanda.com/essays/mother-daughter-relationships-in-two-kinds-by-amy-tan/.

1. IvyPanda . "Mother-Daughter Relationships in “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan." June 28, 2021. https://ivypanda.com/essays/mother-daughter-relationships-in-two-kinds-by-amy-tan/.

Bibliography

IvyPanda . "Mother-Daughter Relationships in “Two Kinds” by Amy Tan." June 28, 2021. https://ivypanda.com/essays/mother-daughter-relationships-in-two-kinds-by-amy-tan/.

Home / Essay Samples / Literature / Jamaica Kincaid / Mother And Daughter Relationship In Girl By Jamaica Kincaid

Mother And Daughter Relationship In Girl By Jamaica Kincaid

• Category: Literature , Sociology
• Topic: Jamaica Kincaid , Society

Pages: 4 (1922 words)

Views: 3883

• Downloads: -->

Works Cited

--> ⚠️ Remember: This essay was written and uploaded by an--> click here.

Found a great essay sample but want a unique one?

are ready to help you with your essay

You won’t be charged yet!

Conflict Resolution Essays

Public Speaking Essays

Rhetorical Strategies Essays

Communication Skills Essays

Socialization Essays

Related Essays

We are glad that you like it, but you cannot copy from our website. Just insert your email and this sample will be sent to you.

By clicking “Send”, you agree to our Terms of service  and  Privacy statement . We will occasionally send you account related emails.

Your essay sample has been sent.

In fact, there is a way to get an original essay! Turn to our writers and order a plagiarism-free paper.

samplius.com uses cookies to offer you the best service possible.By continuing we’ll assume you board with our cookie policy .--> -->