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Andrew Jenkins Category: Self-Awareness
What do you do when bad things happen? Neuroscience has some remarkably useful tips. DUCK! Here comes another of life’s curveballs
In leadership, unexpected curveballs can strike out of the blue at any time. Often, we have no control as to what, where, when or why these happen.
But here’s the rub - you are in control of how you choose to deal with them.
I don’t know about you but, when bad things come along, I just want them to go away. That reminded me of this famous quote:
“Life isn’t about sheltering from the storm…It’s about learning to dance in the rain.”
But, what does it mean to dance in the rain?
To dance in the rain is a metaphor. It means: “that a person has learned not to allow circumstances deter them reaching their full potential. They don’t wait for bad things in their life to go away. Instead, they have a positive attitude and take challenges head on and enjoy the journey.” (Christine Smith, Family and Consumer Education at Wayne County, North Carolina 2013).
I believe there are some useful lessons here, to apply to leadership.
Hmm - fate, Or destiny? Choices, choices!
I have observed that often people seem to spend their lives reacting to life’s circumstances. Driven by fear or out of habit, they seem conditioned on going along a path set by fate (events outside their control).
But every once in a while a person just like you comes along and knocks down all the obstacles that fate puts in their way.
These are the people that realise free will is a gift. But, here’s the thing - you won’t know how to use it until you unwrap it.
Therefore, one day you won’t have to follow fate because you put the effort in and tested yourself. You deserved the right to reach for your destiny instead. It isn’t an easy road, but one less travelled!
Your history does not have to be your destiny” adapted from Alan Cohen
But, when something rains on your parade, dealing with it still takes courage, character, attitude and conviction. These are essential leadership qualities. What’s more, neuroscience says you can train your brain to develop these. We will explore this next.
Uh oh! - we found this monkey in your brain
Sometimes in our lives, when it rains, it pours. That can trigger one or more limiting beliefs. These are basic survival neuro-pathways that your brain can build. When a limiting belief is in play, it fires off all sorts of negative mind chatter that fills up your head with bad thoughts. For instance:
Typical, why does this always happen to me?
Why am I never worthy (or good, pretty, clever) enough?
I always get things wrong; I’m a failure, why do I never learn?
Professor Loretta Breuning, Ph.D. neuroscience expert, author and founder of the Inner Mammal Institute picks up this theme. She says, ‘when your brain senses threat it releases a spike of cortisol - the stress hormone. Cortisol is nature’s emergency alert system. That spurt arouses your survival and protection reactions to avoid a threat. Cortisol creates a bad feeling and that also sparks your limiting beliefs to get your attention.’
It is the wiring of the downstairs part of your brain that warns you of external signals of danger or anything like what has hurt you before. Loretta goes on to say, ‘if you always treat that cortisol blast as if it’s a real threat, you end up with more being triggered’ – and your negative mind chatter hijacks your brain.
So, a practical way to deal with difficult circumstances is to recognise a bad feeling as it happens. That feeling is an old neural pathway that has set off the flow of cortisol. Loretta believes the trick is that when you sense it, give your body time to dispel the cortisol release. Back to my metaphor, to dance in the rain! It is useful to find a distraction to interrupt any limiting beliefs and exit those old patterns.
You get to decide and choose in every moment. (Loretta Breuning)
Train your brain for a change - happy days
Leaders know that they are at their best when they engage their upstairs (thinking) brain. Not only is your upstairs brain infinitely capable, did you know that it also has access to your happy chemicals such as dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin and endorphin?
Loretta says that your upstairs brain looks for facts that make you feel good. When you engage your happy chemicals, they give you a boost. Moreover, they override the feel bad factor of cortisol. Every rain cloud has a silver lining!
Loretta recommends that you can:
Take a step toward a goal, whether a huge goal or tiny goal. This releases dopamine, the reward chemical because your brain anticipates reward instead of anticipating pain.
Stimulate oxytocin – the hug chemical too, with a little faith, take a small risk or a step toward trust (a little bit of real trust is much better than lots of fake trust).
Prompt serotonin by comparing yourself favourably with others instead of wondering what they might say and think about you.
Trigger endorphin with a belly laugh - a real laugh. So, make time for humour and things you find funny. Endorphin is released to counter pain too. So, it gives us a feeling of joy when we work hard to overcome an obstacle.
See all these in action and check out this inspired video clip of a child’s simple, but profound words on a rainy day. At the same time, it teaches us not to sweat the small stuff:
Oi, you! Yes, you. Look in the mirror - that’s who’s in your way
Here are ten useful tips for leaders. They help you engage the upstairs part of your brain along with your happy chemicals. They also teach you not to take yourself so seriously at work and in life:
1. Have a go at taking the occasional risk. Like the mother in the film, challenge your embarrassment. Nobody will care if you get a bit ‘red-faced’ once in a while
2. Set yourself a goal to take a few chances. For example, take time out to build your team, or present your ideas and passions to wider audiences
3. Drop the pretense that you are The Big Cheese. Eat a bit of humble pie for a change and start to accept other peoples’ ideas too. You might surprise yourself
4. To make a mistake is okay. But your fixed mindset will tell you that you aren’t capable if you fail. So tell yourself that to learn from failure leads to better success
5. It’s okay to lose once in a while - things don’t always work out. The trick is to learn from the disappointment
6. Give yourself a slap on the back whenever you stop yourself being harsh and critical. Learn to feel good about others and yourself instead
7. The ultimate source of happiness is a positive mindset. So, see the funny side of your oversights and flaws
8. Be generous, kind and above all forgive others (how are you doing with that one?). Have gratitude too
9. Nothing is permanent
10. Smile, if you want a smile back.
So, work on these tips, get out of your own way and every now and again dance in the rain. Let go of the little things and don’t let problems rain on your parade!
Read more from Andrew Jenkins .
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My name is Andrew Jenkins, and I am proud to be MD of PDx Consulting Ltd - PDx is dedicated to developing you as leaders to evolve into businesses that have a core purpose beyond just making money, that make a difference to peoples’ lives making the world better.
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I love team building with ambitious leaders to create great workplaces. If you’re willing to invest in new skills and step up to new challenges, then I’m the man.
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I create structures that help you to learn directly and build your skills in emotional intelligence, collaboration and cohesion, trust and openness.
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Sharing inspiring stories: love that transcends all adversity, even alzheimer’s..
Posted January 14, 2011
New Year’s Greetings!
We need to share our inspiring stories. This one, recounted by a nurse, happened at a busy clinic at 8:30 one morning. An elderly gentleman in his 80’s arrived to have stitches removed from his hand and said he was in hurry because he had another appointment at 9 o’clock.
While attending to the various steps in any medical visit, the nurse noticed that he kept looking at his watch. When she asked him if had another doctor’s appointment, he answered, “No, but I need to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with my wife.”
When the nurse inquired about her health, the gentleman replied that she had Alzheimer’s, and he always went over first thing every morning to be with her. She asked if his wife would be upset if he was a bit late. “No, she probably wouldn’t be, because she hasn’t recognized me for several years.”
Surprised, the nurse asked, “And you still go every morning even though she doesn’t know who you are?”
He smiled, patted the nurse’s hand, and replied, ”She doesn’t know me, but I still know who she is.”
The nurse, holding back tears as he left, thought to herself, ‘That is the kind of love I want in my life.’
This kind of love accepts everything that life brings, including the ravages of dementia or any severely debilitating illness. It’s far beyond ordinary concepts about what love is. As the saying goes: the happiest people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have. Or to put it another way, ‘life isn’t about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain.’
Go to my website!
Olivia Hoblitzelle is the author of Aging With Wisdom: Reflections, Stories & Teachings and Ten Thousand Joys & Ten Thousand Sorrows: A Couple’s Journey Through Alzheimer’s .
Understanding what emotional intelligence looks like and the steps needed to improve it could light a path to a more emotionally adept world.
Around 200 protestors gathered in the rain for an emergency rally in front of University Hall. Harvard University Police officers and vehicles also established their presence in the area. According to an HUPD officer stationed on the scene, they were instructed to keep students safe and allow protests to proceed unless they became violent or destructive.
The group grew to roughly 500 people, with organizers announcing that it is “time to march.” As protesters marched around Harvard Yard, organizers ran out from various freshman dorms with tent equipment to set up an encampment in Harvard Yard in front of the John Harvard statue.
Students and volunteers raced to set up an encampment in front of University Hall in the Yard, pitching tents amid backpacks and other supplies.
As encampment members set up their tents, protesters lined up outside the string-and-posts barrier in a show of solidarity — their signs called for Harvard’s divestment from Israel and a ceasefire in Gaza.
Franklin D. and Florence Rosenblatt Professor of the Arts Vijay Iyer spoke at the encampment, reading a statement from Harvard Faculty and Staff for Justice in Palestine. In his speech, Iyer called for the reinstatement of the PSC.
A counter-protester wrapped in an Israeli flag recorded a safety marshall stationed near the encampment.
Protesters pitched a dozen camping tents and a central tent for food, an inflatable watermelon — a symbol of Palestinian solidarity — and laid out handmade signs calling for divestment.
Student speakers and organizers addressed encampment protesters and onlookers throughout the early afternoon.
Protesters wrapped in keffiyehs held signs in Arabic around the encampment and John Harvard statue.
Protesters teamed up in groups, continuing to assemble tents through the afternoon. Organizers also stocked a central tent with food — from chips, cookies, and applesauce to produce and bread — in preparation for their potentially dayslong stay.
Protesters participated in the dabke, a Levantine folk dance which involves holding hands as one circles the encampment.
Protesters fixed pro-Palestine signs and banners to tents around the encampment, including slogans reading “Harvard Out of Occupied Palestine” and “Free Palestine!”
History professor Erez Manela, left, showed his Harvard ID to campus security staff before entering a regularly scheduled faculty meeting in University Hall.
A cameraman from 7 News and a woman beside him stood outside Harvard Yard’s gates attempting to capture the action on the inside. Harvard Yard has been shut down to all but Harvard ID holders all week.
Protesters formed a barrier with keffiyehs around one of the tents as Muslim participants engaged in Asr, or afternoon prayer.
J. Kojo Acheampong ’26, who has helped lead several pro-Palestine protests in the months since Oct. 7, sat at the base of the John Harvard statue.
In the late afternoon, protesters assembled a second wave of eight tents, expanding the encampment deeper into Harvard Yard and towards Johnston Gate. As of Wednesday evening, the encampment consisted of more than 30 tents.
Harvard University police opened the doors to Massachusetts Hall, which houses the office of the Harvard president, to allow several people to exit. Police kept watch at the front door of Massachusetts Hall throughout the afternoon and night.
Protest organizers hosted a teach-in, during which organizers spoke to students about the history of student protest, including the singing of protest songs. The teach-in was cut short due to sporadic rain showers over the next few hours.
Around sunset, students lined up and got dinner from the center tent in the encampment, eating food prepared by organizers, pizza donated earlier in the day, and leftover seder food.
Protesters in the encampment prepared for potential rain by placing tarps and rain covers over the tents. Students also fixed additional posters, flags, and signs to the outside of several tents.
Just before the College’s “quiet hours” began at 11 p.m., students went into the tents to sleep as others continued to transport and deliver supplies for the night.
Just past midnight, nearly all encampment protesters settled into tents across Harvard Yard, wrapping up nighttime conversations and chatter. Small groups of protesters circled the encampment on watch as Harvard University Police Department vehicles stood by.
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MOSCOW, Dec. 26—A growing reversal of the policies of former Premier Nikita S. Khrushchev, especially in agriculture, was‐extended today to the field of literary criticism.
The literary‐union newspaper Literaturnaya Gazeta published a laudatory review of Yefim Dorosh's essay “Half Rain, Half Sunshine,” which gives what is widely regarded as a realistic depiction of the countryside of central European Russia.
The essay, published last summer in the liberal literary monthly Novy Mir, was violently attacked in the Soviet press just before Mr. Khrushchev's overthrow in October as misrepresenting life in rural areas.
One critique, by L. Lebedev, a collective farm chairman from the Galich area northeast of Moscow, appeared in Selskaya Zhizn (Rural Life), the farm newspaper of the Communist party's Central Committee over whose content Mr. Khrushchev had direct control.
Mr. Lebedev charged Mr. Dorosh with conveying a picture of “prerevolutionary dreariness, despondency, stagnation, and complete hopelessness drifting from every page.”
The farm chairman accused the author of concentrating attention “on an old monastery, an ancient lake, an abandoned grave of some count instead of writing, say, about the new widescreen moviehouse.”
Mr. Lebedev said Mr. Dorosh had misrepresented the cultural level of farm youth and the rural intelligentsia by depicting them as “primitive, uneducated people without interest in literature or the arts.”
Mr. Dorosh had written that the residents of his fictitious country town of Raigorod “read little, went, to be sure, to the movies, but had not been in the regional museum, in the picture gallery, in the theater or at the philharmonic concert.”
Today's review in Literaturnaya Gazeta by Vladimir Voronov, a critic, contended that Mr. Dorosh had performed a useful service by drawing attention to problems that continued to bedevil Soviet agriculture and life in the countryside.
The essay, published while Mr. Khrushchev was still in power, questioned the effectiveness of some reforms inspired by the former Premier and criticized the continuing close supervision of farm production and the imposition of output plans from above.
In an evident allusion to Mr. Khrushchev's style of running Soviet agriculture, Mr. Voronov wrote:
“Dorosh regards the struggle for a growth of the rural economy not as a short‐lived, noisy campaign but as a long, complicated haul.”
Mr. Voronov assailed the farm chairman for having judged the essay simply on the basis that his own area was more prosperous than the one pictured in “Half Rain, Half Sunshine.”
The reviewer said it was not literary criticism to say:
“We live better” and to tell “about a milkmaid who had obtained 800 quarts of milk more from a cow than in the previous year.”
The controversial essay is part of a series of “rural diaries” that Mr. Dorosh, a resident of Moscow, has been writing since 1956 on the basis of periodic visits to an unidentified small town and the surrounding countryside in central Russia.
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When you sit at home and dwell on things that don't matter or that are tormenting you, why can't you just go out and make it a better day. What I mean is just go and dance in the rain. I believe in dancing in the rain because you can turn any sad, gloomy, or plain old days and turn them into fun, exciting, and happy days. When sad days come ...
The lesson "DANCING IN THE RAIN" written by Azim Premji. He is an Indian business tycoon and philanthropist. He devotes a lot of time and money to improve the educational system in India. The essay deals with the excessive burden - both physical and mental that is imposed on children now-a-days.
Singing in the Rain is an American comedy musical film starring Gene Kelly, Debbie Reynolds, Donald O'Connor and Jean Hagen, and directed by Gene Kelly and Stanley Donen. It offers a comic depiction of Hollywood, and its transition from silent films to talking films. Throughout the movie, people could see many different elements that make the ...
Dancing In The Rain Short Story. 996 Words4 Pages. I grew up in the land of rain, grey, cold and damp. That's why Mary Poppins with her 'brolly' descended to cheer us up and sprinkle a teaspoonful of her magical sugar over our magnificent gardens to ensure they were the envy of the world. London rain was not the steamy, humidity of the ...
Dancing in the Rain (pedagogical assemblage) September 2013. Projects: Psychologist Forum. An Open Forum for Expert Opinions and Discussion. Authors: Irina Mikhailovna Pechonkina.
On April 27, the Seattle community showed up to celebrate the 21st Annual White Center Cambodian New Year Festival. This all-day New Year's event, organized by the Cambodian Cultural Alliance of Washington, was packed with programming that'd please any ancestors. Through the downpour of rain, festivalgoers gathered for monk blessings, traditional dance performances, a bok lahong (green ...
Singin In The Rain Dance Essay. Jarod Kintz an author known for his sense of humor is quoted as saying: "Dance like there's nobody watching. Or filming. Never mind that creepy guy in the corner with the camcorder. Just keep dancing" (Kintz, 2011). Dancing has been a great way to show exactly how a culture develops over time.
Among the three narrative functions that Dunne proposes in his essay, the third one - "dancing reveals subconscious elements of a character's personality" - is especially applicable to the film Singin' in the Rain. In this film, dancing represents the inner conflict within the main character Don Lockwood (played by Gene Kelly).
"Dancing in the rain" is a common phrase that people throw about to describe a time in which they turned an awful event into a terrific event by simply making the most of the situation. But t he art of dancing in the rain is a tricky skill to master because it takes great effort. For some reason, people really overlook the good unless it ...
4. How does the movie use song and dance to tell the story of the film? The characters in Singin' in the Rain often resort to singing, dancing, and performance to express how they feel and to move through various moments in their lives. When Lockwood is down in the dumps, Cosmo sings "Make 'Em Laugh" to cheer him up.
The American comedy musical film 'Singing in the Rain' starring Eugene Curran Kelly, Debbie Reynolds, Donald O'Connor, and Jean Hagen, and directed by Debbie Reynolds and Stanley Donen. It offers a comic depiction of Hollywood and its transition from silent films to talking films. Throughout the movie, you can see many various elements ...
Featured Essays Essays on the Radio; Special Features; 1950s Essays Essays From the 1950s Series; ... Dancing In the Rain Human instinct. In a personal crisis, human instinct tells you to do one of two things; sit back, mope, feel sorry for […] Dancing In the Rain. Human instinct. In a personal crisis, human instinct tells you to do one of ...
The scene shifts to an "Amateur Night," as Cosmo and Lockwood do a shtick-y dance routine in front of an audience, as Lockwood reiterates his motto in voiceover: "Dignity, always dignity." ... Essays for Singin' in the Rain. Singin' in the Rain essays are academic essays for citation. These papers were written primarily by students ...
One can learn and do, even if you aren't out dancing. Yet, eventually, we must take action. Sometimes there is no possible way to do anything without getting wet. That is when we must learn to dance in the rain. Or to do whatever we need to get done.Rain or shine, life must go on. The implication of dancing is that we are enjoying it.
I learned to watch the birds build their nests, delighted in a rainbow after I had played in the rain, watched the sunsets and only went inside when I was called by my full name. I found joy in the smallest things like climbing a big tree and crawling under the house to hide and drink an Orange Crush that I had charged to my Dad at the grocery ...
9. Nothing is permanent. 10. Smile, if you want a smile back. So, work on these tips, get out of your own way and every now and again dance in the rain. Let go of the little things and don't let problems rain on your parade! Read more from Andrew Jenkins.
This one, recounted by a nurse, happened at a busy clinic at 8:30 one morning. An elderly gentleman in his 80's arrived to have stitches removed from his hand and said he was in hurry because he ...
Around 200 protestors gathered in the rain for an emergency rally in front of University Hall. Harvard University Police officers and vehicles also established their presence in the area.
The university had set a noon deadline for an end to overnight stays at the site, but students remained there on Monday afternoon. By Maia Coleman and Lola Fadulu Maia Coleman reported from the N ...
See the article in its original context from February 25, 1988, Section A, Page 31 February 25, 1988, Section A, Page 31
Orthodox observance, Moscow. TimesMachine is an exclusive benefit for home delivery and digital subscribers.
We hope people will come together to discuss their essays in a respectful manner in the classroom, in book clubs, in places of worship, and other public spaces. To help you do this in your community, we offer the following tools: Discussion Guides This guide can help you engage a group of people in a moderated conversation about belief and ...
The rain pores down, and the children want to go out side and play, but it'll be cold and wet. So they put on their rain coats and run out side. I look at all of them slashing in puddles, and I run out side, and dance. I dance like no one is watching, without music; there is still a beat to dance to. I believe in dancing in the rain.
Despite bone chilling weather, our visit to Moscow was blissful due to the warm hearted nature of the devotees who love to chant the holy names and dance in ...
MOSCOW WIDENS NEW POLICY LINE; Essay, Scored During Rule of Khrushchev, Praised for View of Hard Rural Life. Send any friend a story. As a subscriber, you have 10 gift articles to give each month ...